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KK DrillBoy C1 RE2

Welcome. I am Yuri Strelkov and offer you great new ship from my business Komfort Kompany. Me and my men start business to make good, comfortable ships that even stupidest people can use. It not official business, as far as government know, but my friend have very big garage and we do all spaceship work there. We get startup money from secret financer who go by name Fairy Princess. We no think real Princess at all, but we call him what he want. Very powerful, very scary man. Demands good product from us or big trouble. Honestly, name Komfort Kompany come from my previous business which I no tell you too much about, but we just print up new business cards and I don't want waste. For new business we make great ship and we have it here for you to buy from us.

Ship is miner. Very good miner. We give ship sexy name Drillboy so you not forget. We have genius engineer Ivan Blech make ship for you. He no wish to do it, but we take his family and trap in basement, and he work for you now. We make sure he does his best work and make us good money and make you good ship. It do what we want or Ivan in big trouble. Ivan family in big trouble. This way we know it work. It is only way to know.

This ship great early ship miner. First ship you make, other than little buggy to find cobalt for drill. No waste time making other things, just make this. It very cheap, have two mechanical drills to start. We make sure it can do more though. You need ship to go into space and go to other planets and moons and things before make first CV. This ship can do that for you. It can have shield to protect you. In cockpit it have genuine real air you can breathe. We give this to you free of charge. Consider it gift to you and your family. It is miner though. Not fighting ship. We put on little gun to kill annoying buzz buzz dronies, but it still mining ship. Don't be idiot, just go mine and get stuff for upgrade and first Capital ship.

Ship in very good shape now, but at first we find booby traps Ivan put in ship. Ivan kill 2 of my men. We chop off two of his fingers to punish, but let him keep rest for work. He healed now. We start making his wife do mining test missions to make sure ship safe and he no put in booby traps. She try to get away first time, but Ivan no know yet we use wife for this and he booby trap generator explosion. She not get very far. Very lucky woman, only lose leg. Now she work for us good. We tell her what will happen to daughter if she not come back with ship next time.

When first make ship, it is good, but only what you need. Super cheap, very easy to make. Two drills on side all you need. Have to get little bit of cobalt first for drills, but that it really. Everything else easy find on home planet. You can do that, no? Very fast ship. Very big cargo hold for its tiny size. Zip around super fast like kitty cat with fork jammed in eye. Later on you wish to go to other planet? No problem. Ivan draw on bottom of ship. He tell you which squares to use blink blink gun on and make disappear. Make it real simple so anyone can do. We test with Ivan's daughter. Even for girl, she not very smart. We give her blink blink gun and she still put on Jump drive no problem. You smarter than little girl, no? Ivan write on ship for all areas so anyone can do. He make squares for Jump Drive, Shield, Pentaxid tank (PX) and 2 basic CPU (label C). Look on bottom of ship, he write there for you. You want these new things? Use blink blink gun and make squares disappear. Put in new things. No get fancy and screw up ship with your stupid flower ideas. Just switch old squares with new squares. This ship is miner. Not pretty man ship for pretty little man who likes wear mother's underwear. Just go blink blink and put in new things. We already put in extra generator power so you no need to worry about adding shield, laser, and whatnot. Ship ready for it, just put on. At first ship work fine with no extra cpu. You want to upgrade ship and make fancy though, you need cpu. One extra cpu get you upgrade to 2 laster drill or more normal drill, shield, jump drive, and pentaxid tank. Very nice ship get you rare ore early in game. Super easy upgrade. You go to other planets and do mining. Can kill buzz buzz dronies if want with little gun on ship. If you wish to go to 4 laser drills just take drills out from side positions and put 2 on top and 2 on bottom of ship. Keep same width. Ivan mark where to put. No need to use blink blink gun and make squares disappear or do anything fancy. Just add new drills to top and bottom and get rid of old, super easy. Ship start 3 square tall, now you make it 5 tall. Even stupid person do it no problem. If want 4 laser drills or upgrade engines to plasma need 2nd basic cpu. Ivan label a second green square for 2nd basic cpu if need. If even more need can still add more cpu or new generator in old side drill hole which now empty. Very advanced ship at this point, but no problem. Ivan make easy for you. Room in old holes for improved cpu, new generator, or more boxes. Friend Igor even put in 2 more gun to clear out Abandoned POI. Work okay if ship have shield. Really don't need other planet mining ship ever. Work really great up to 4 laser drill, even if include shield and jump drive. Ivan make super easy for you.

If make first capital ship and feel no need jump drive? Ivan say make it disappear with your blink blink gun and put back in boxes to hold more things. Everything connect good. Say no have capital ship? Maybe we make Ivan design big ship for you. He try to escape yesterday and we have to see if he okay first. Get shot in shoulder, silly man. We take to animal doctor friend and he say Ivan to be okay. Ivan make everything super easy on this ship to add and subtract when you need. Our customers no need college degree. They no need school at all. Ivan go to school for all of us. Just push button and make drills go whirly sound. You can do that, no?

I give now to you official Komfort Kompany oath.

I, Yuri Strelkov, owner and leader of Komfort Kompany, swear on lives of Ivan Blech and family that Drillboy is greatest mining ship in galaxy. I present to you Komfort Kompany mining ship Drillboy. It only ship you need. It only ship you deserve.