Deep Rock Galactic

Deep Rock Galactic

535 ratings
Advanced Petting Guide
By glorp
This is a detailed, complex guide on how to pet the various lifeforms in Hoxxes in the most effective and optimized form.
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Introduction
Rock and stone, reader, I'm Dr. Bogsnot and I'm a petting aficionado. Before landing on a job inside Deep Rock Galactic to become a driller I have petted plenty of creatures in my homeplanet, I used to work as a caretaker in a pet shop due to my petting skills, I got paid handsomely. In this guide, I'll teach you the reader on the mastery of petting in Hoxxes with my observations and knowledge of many things in Hoxxes after some years of serving in this company. I often get mails from the upper managment complaining on wasting half-hours of a mission by petting a lootbug, sometimes you have those who disagree with your choices in your life, you just gotta ignore 'em. -Dr. Bogsnot

This guide will be seperated in different levels as you read it, it is determined by the difficulty of basic petting and also the difficulty of the most effective petting.
Beginner
Lootbugs
Lootbugs are the petting subjects most dwarves are familiar with due to their likely cute appearance and large presence between biomes, since I've seen so many of them petting these little creatures, unfortunately, many dwarves also exterminate for they contain a selection of minerals such as gold and nitra, especially the ones that looks shiny golden from the outside.

If any dwarf hasn't killed it yet, going for a pet is pretty easy as it doesn't startle the creature and simple patting is enough for the Lootbug to appreciate, sometimes if the patting is very good then it will even drop a nugget of nitra or gold!

Whilst due to company's policy that 'bugs cannot be brought back to the Space Rig', some dwarves were able to bring lootbugs discreetly back to base, we don't know where they go after but the fate is likely it got squashed by the security or it's just chilling in a hidden place somewhere.

Breathers
Breathers, also affectionately called Pog Plants are what seems to be plants present almost exclusively in the Radioactive Exclusion Zone, the appearance is uncannily similar to a mouth of a shaved breathing dwarf and the texture is slimy and 'gross' for some, not many will be comfortable to approach with the intent of petting but they're quite relatively easy and tame to pet, they seem to like it observing the frequency of their breathing during petting.

Just don't get your hand stuck in it's... 'throat?' I don't know.

Cave Vines
Cave Vines, like Breathers they are like plants but not quite and can only be found in Radioactive Exclusion Zones, not only they can be petted, they also want it! You can easily observe this by the fact they try to keep close contact with you, they are a bit uncomfortable and doesn't have a lot of respect for privacy yes but they might feel lonely in the cave and all they need is just a simple pet.

With the fact they remain close to you once you get in it's sight, it is pretty easy to pet them, although most of them stay up in the ceiling and they could get mistaken for Cave Leeches, something that you do NOT want to pet. You can tell the difference between them if it can grab your face with it's guttering claws or not.
Intermediate
Glyphid Grunts
Unfortunately, larger Glyphids are too furious for to be tamed (for now) and smaller Glyphids are too stupid to even be petted, so we'll have to stick to what we see every day in this job, the Glyphid Grunts, normally their instinct is to bite you with their mandibles and stab you with their legs but certain dwarves are beastmasters and are able to domesticate these creatures in time, domesticated Glyphids can very well be petted as any lootbug found in Hoxxes and they visibly enjoy it! Just look at their mandibles opening up! So cute!


Glyphid Grunts, their original variant are the softest to pet, however other variants does differ.
All of these glyphids can be found in all regions, they're pretty much the dominating species.
I haven't covered region variants however, due to them being almost similiar only with the added aspect of the regional's elements. So the frost ones feels cold to the touch while the radioactive ones gives you a funny little tumor in your finger.

Glyphid Slashers
Glyphid Slashers are essentially sharper grunts, which means it's just harder to pet them without your fingers getting stabbed if you don't have any safety equipment for doing so. Either that or you pet them by their chin or belly or anywhere else that isn't too thorny.

Glyphid Guards
Glyphid Guards are like the grunts but tougher and harder, this means it can withstand more pets than the other variants, the surfaces for petting this one, notably the armour feels very rough and rocky to pet on.


Dorettas
Dorettas, or if you are boring, Drilldozers are the second most common subject for petting, now she is relatively easy to pet so you might wonder why is this the 'Intermediate' section, well, when you're in a mission with her it's 90% of the times that she is being swarmed by bugs which will attack her and you have to keep constant mainteance and guns on the bugs.
Petting her is for her good though, as it likely soothes her in the mission, despite her dedication to drilling all the tunnels she is a very anxious lady and it breaks my heart to see her treatment by the upper managment, considering her 'disposable'.

If all is good and safe though, this could be moved to the earlier section.
Credits to my fellow Scout for recording this footage of them petting her.
Expert
Rockpox
Easiest pet subjects, as they appear directly on The Space Rig and R&D department as long Mission Control isn't keeping an eye on you, just take them out of the canister and begin petting it, it ain't too nice though since it squirms and it feels prickly and disgusting with fluids.

I was recently told those spreads disease by contact and any longer exposure would lead to chronic illnesses so, unless there is a new (safe) method of petting it. Do not pet it.

Hexawing Gniffers
Hexawing Gniffers are one of the toughest creatures to pet in this list, it's not hostile like the Glyphids can be but it is damn skittish and scaredy, and they can also only exclusively appear in the colorful Azure Weald, you can essentially only get one pat-pat (so like 2 pats) in one of those flying boys.

You may also notice my pistol here has a bit of Rockpox here, unfortunately that was due to the incident prior to this scene but I couldn't help it.


OOC UPDATE: I know a whole lot hasn't read since I'm writing, but it's better now than later, I just recently came back to the game a month ago and to my surprise, this has became an actual issue. I'm keeping this section, but my intentions were not to encourage or enforce griefing behaviour, I thought the irony of the guide would reflect on that.

Scouts
Scouts are the hardest petting subject, as they require the most sosphicated technique in the history of petting, I will teach you this technique called the 'The Satchel Technique' by demonstrating it on my fellow scout. What you will need is a satchel of explosives and-


DO NOT FOLLOW THIS PART OF THE GUIDE.
Conclusion
UPDATE: Whilst writing the guide on Scout, the upper managment has personally sent me a direct call threatening action over me and when I finally went back to the station I was greeted by another dwarf squad pointing their arms at me, as of writing this message I have stolen a drop pod to camp somewhere hidden on the Hoxxes until they finally give up on me and I make up another identity to join back in.

For now, I'll recommend to NOT EVER USE the 'Satchel Technique' on ANY SCOUT YOU FIND EVER, I've had to learn this the HARDEST way possible.

I think the upper managment have latched a special bounty mission on my head, because I just hear dwarves doing nothing but excavating and such. I'll have to save myself.


Well reader, I hope this guide has been useful for you, I bless you in this journey of petting with plentiful of Rocks and Stones.
If you have any suggestions or more information to bring for this guide regarding the petting on Hoxxes wildlife, please let me know on the comments!

Rock and Stone, lads!
51 Comments
TechnoWolfNZ 30 Nov, 2024 @ 10:20pm 
please do not c4
the scout
texug 3 Nov, 2024 @ 2:32pm 
Rock and stone!
TheCoolerMalcolm 2 Nov, 2024 @ 6:16pm 
Thank you for the guide, Bogsnot. However, I heard some digging during my last mission in the Sandblasted Corridors. They were hasty and unlike any digging I've ever heard. From the compass on the top of my screen, I could tell they were heading east. And a suggestion, Hack-C can also be pet, although unlike Doretta, he doesn't like it.

I am writing this after my Rockpox treatment from the medbay. Petting the rockpox was horrible! It was slimy and gross and it felt weird. My gloves were sticky and my hands were tingly and weak. I was diagnosed with Rockpox after a week. Management has told me to not make any more contact with the strange disease. Right now, I am fine, however if I ever get dared to pet Rockpox, I will knock on the containers ONLY.

Rock and stone!
Epic_Gamer1521 2 Nov, 2024 @ 10:26am 
nice
Burnt Toast 28 Sep, 2024 @ 8:38am 
it was nemesis they try to kill you tho
Burnt Toast 28 Sep, 2024 @ 8:38am 
you missed one
The Interloper 18 Sep, 2024 @ 4:03am 
Roses are red
Blackout Stout
If you are the Driller
C4 the Scout
~The Interloper
Skarbrand 16 Sep, 2024 @ 10:52am 
You forgot the hacking bot
seepMcseep 17 Aug, 2024 @ 3:53am 
Rock and Stone!
gordon fleaman 4 Aug, 2024 @ 6:12pm 
I play as scout tho