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Good Job Fella: A Guide To Staring

By Kazzi

Welcome to Staring Contest, a game I was gifted to review and hopefully isn't a bitcoin mining operation or some such because I genuinely would like to engage with simple games like this in good faith instead of fearing for my gaming PC when a Unity game ticks up that GPU usage.

Was previously called Why Does This Game Use 30% Of My GPU?: A Guide To Staring, but now that the "Less GPU" early update has dropped, it only uses at most 15%, so I can't use that funny title anymore. Glad its performance was improved though

Award

Created by

Kazzi
Offline

Category: Achievements, Gameplay Basics, Maps or Levels, Secrets, Walkthroughs

Languages: English

Posted

Updated

17 Oct, 2023 @ 5:00pm

21 Oct, 2023 @ 7:49pm

48	Unique Visitors
0	Current Favorites

Guide Index

Overview

How To Stare

Opponents and Tells

Achievements

Comments

How To Stare

Welcome to Staring Contest, a game I was gifted to review and hopefully isn't a bitcoin mining operation or some such because I genuinely would like to engage with simple games like this in good faith instead of fearing for my gaming PC when a Unity game ticks up that GPU usage.

The rules of the game are simple: keep an eye out for your opponent's tells, and press the ACCUSE bell when you think your opponent blinks. If you can't figure it out, you can press GIVE UP at the bottom to back out. If you press the ACCUSE bell early, there's no penalty. Now, for each of your opponents...

Opponents and Tells

Alberto

Difficulty: Easy
Description: Seemingly a serious man. He does not know how to play this game tho. . .
Tell: Blinks after a few seconds with SFX.
Achievements: A Warm Welcome, Impossible

Pepito

Difficulty: Hard
Description: Alberto's son. He's a trained professional and has been staring at others since day one. He makes Alberto proud.
Tell: Eyes turn red, then blinks with SFX.
Easter Eggs: Pressing the bell early will make "Aight" appear above "Bet" on Pepito's t-shirt.

Mr. Skeleton

Difficulty: Dead serious
Description: Escaped local cemetery.
Tell: Collapses to the table.
Easter Eggs: Clicking on his eyes will make them pop out, forcing him to collapse sooner.
Achievements: Poke of Insight, Happy Skeleton

Moai

Difficulty: Stoned
Description: OOOOOOOOUUUUUUU
Tell: Click on it many, many times.
Achievements: Stone Whisperer

Potato

Difficulty: Mashed
Description: He's got really cute eyes tho
Tell: Eventually explodes.

Gecko

Difficulty: ???
Description: I'm 100% certain he's cheating
Tell: Click on the tip of his tongue when he licks his eye.

Fish

Difficulty: Fish
Description: Fish
Tell: fish????
Achievements: Fish

Achievements

There are presently seven achievements to find in Staring Contest.

Victory Achievements

A Warm Welcome

Defeat Alberto!
Press the bell when he blinks.

Stone Whisperer

Defeat Moai. 🗿
Click on Moai many, many times.

Fish

Fish
Presumably defeat Fish?

The Golden 100

Defeat 100 opponents!!!
Defeat opponents 100 times. As you'd imagine, this can be farmed easily against Alberto, though it's easier against Mr. Skelly as you can force his blinks.

Defeat Achievements

Happy Skeleton

Lose to a Skelly!
Quit the match.

Impossible

Manage to somehow lose to Alberto
Quit the match.

Easter Egg Achievements

Poke of Insight

There's something funny about Skelly's eyes...
Click Skelly's eyes.

12 Comments

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AreWeGaming 2 Nov, 2023 @ 9:26pm

Fish - Move the Table

Kazzi [author] 29 Oct, 2023 @ 9:25pm

having to wait ages for the fish to blink isnt great for the "bitcoin miner" allegations i gotta admit

Sosich 29 Oct, 2023 @ 9:18am

Has anyone managed to crack the fish? I know they blink when it's time to flush it down the toilet, but I'm no willing to wait that long -.-

chiken SKINS 25 Oct, 2023 @ 9:51am

Fish is beatable actually :)
But to get the achievement, you will need to wait a bit...

lol 23 Oct, 2023 @ 12:44pm

You have to stare at the fish for a looong time.

Kazzi [author] 21 Oct, 2023 @ 7:51pm

when you click on "thanks for playing!" on the main menu it makes a little pop noise. desperately, i clicked on the letters F I S and H. nothing special happened but i feel like its worth noting

Kazzi [author] 21 Oct, 2023 @ 3:13pm

Yeah Fish is certainly a puzzler.

AFAK 21 Oct, 2023 @ 2:14pm

I figured out the Moai, but not the Fish.

Kazzi [author] 21 Oct, 2023 @ 2:01pm

lol's correct, just had to keep going

lol 20 Oct, 2023 @ 7:43am

Fool's, you just have to click the moai more.

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