levi's a genius for this one, basic progression netting you practically free achievements? revolutionary. we can only fathom the day his intellect comes to the conclusion of "gate unlocks behind achievements". regardless, this game's good, meaning you're gonna play the game, meaning you'll get all these just by being good at the game, which might not apply to everyone sorry

• go on then. do it. beat the whole game on brutal without getting this. iron god this entire ass game. i dare you.

• Complete The Purple Himbus, defeating the Unhinged Cube in the process, simple.

• Complete The Grongle Sweats, defeating Cumswamp in the process, good area names btw.

• Complete The Beebis Edge, defeating the Wicked Bulwark in the process, hope you still got enough health.

• Complete The Foul Domain, defeating that stupid demon Mervin that caused this whole mess!

of course, basic progression is gonna be hard if you don't get some good items (always take the damage ups)! there's 5 categories of items to fill out, although some items aren't in any of them, but still take those you gotta fill the entire catalog for all the achievements

• Collect all the punk items, which are mostly DMG ups, the stat you most certainly want alot of.

• Collect all the drug items, which are mostly SPD ups, but keep Heroin handy once you find it, there's more to be achieved with that one.

• Collect all the "adult" items, which are mostly ROF ups, for you Isaac fans it's the same as Tears Up, because i'd be crying if i saw your Nudie Mag too.

• Collect all the "gendered" items, which are mostly BSP ups, and let's just be real it's the worst stat in the game only go for it if you need the item in the collection or you got Safety Pin.

• Collect all the food related items, which are related to Heart gain, and while you're grabbing those try to max out your health too, it could help down the line who knows :^)

• Collect every last item in STD, make this game your ♥♥♥♥♥!

can it truly be considered a proper steam achievement guide without the section that's just "all the achievements i can't clump together otherwise"?

• Use the spacebar item Heroin once, which allows you to drain a stat by one stage and reallocate it to another stat. But the cost can be pretty steep, learn to use it in moderation or die trying...

• Kill over 300 enemies, don't let any police, wage cucks, klanners, or random geometric shapes stand in your way!

• Touch the Blood Donation Machine 100 times, it's going to a better cause so don't just blow up the machine after you get your damage up because you want your hearts back (although i don't think doing that actually subtracts from your total)

• Buy over 50 items, capitalism at its finest!

• Take your chances on the slots 777 times, capitalism at its grimiest!

• of course levi adds another achievement just as i properly finish the guide smh Just have a bunch of hearts all at once. Leftovers is probably the best bet for getting this, combine that with the Battery and you're laughin'.

yes, even your good pal Chester is hiding some cheevos from you, that devious son of a finger gun. they're not the greatest ohioan mysteries ever devised, but steam won't give you any hints before you get them, so hey good thing i'm here right? you'll like share favorite and award my guide, right?

• Not an actual hidden achievement i don't think, but it's about secrets! Find a secret room! C'mon, it shouldn't be that hard, just be good at the game and don't get hit ever you'll find one.

• Very simply, beat Standard Mode for the first time. I'm sure you'll get there one day champ.

• After you've got Nothing (lol), beat Brutal Mode for the first time. I'm sure i'll get there one day.

~ Find a note. Just find the Guitar Pick and die a painful death.

AND THE NUMBER ONE HARDEST ACHIEVEMENT:

SHOOT











WITH ONLY A MEASLY 0.1% OF PLAYERS OWNING THIS ACHIEVEMENT because 1.1.0 genuinely just dropped i'm writing this section at like 6 in the morning on the 30th SHOOT IS OFFICIALLY ONE OF THE LEAST ACHIEVED ACHIEVEMENTS TO EVER ACHIEVE ANYTHING IN LIFE, CONTESTING EVEN THE JACOB & ESAU UNLOCKS FROM ISAAC REPENTANCE IN SHEER DIFFICULTY, SO YOU'RE DAMN LUCKY YOU GOT A TRUE GAMING MESSIAH LIKE ME (by the way hiiii i'm loubob nice to meet you for most likely the first and last time, ever listen to red vox? good ass band, there's even a reference to them in this game i think that's really sick) TO FINALLY THROW YOU ACROSS THE FINISH LINE THAT IS STD'S MOST ASCENDEDLY MURDEROUS ACHIEVEMENT OF SUPREME DEATH

NOW THE REAL & TRUE UNLOCK METHOD TO GOD'S GREATEST CHALLENGE AKA SHOOT:

• With default bindings, enter a run on either difficulty and press the "Left" or "Right" "Arrow Keys" once. Chester Bodean will fire a "Finger Bullet" either to the "Left" or "Right" depending on which "Arrow Key" you pressed, fulfilling the conditions of the achievement to "Shoot a bullet".

THAT IS IF YOU CAN EVEN HOPE TO PREFORM SUCH A SKILL-TESTING CHALLENGE IN THE FIRST PLACE SUCKERRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR



oh i just got the joke there's achievements for Shoot Trip and Die just like the game

yep, that's that. you can go on your merry way now, maybe play some shoot trip die even

i mean if you got anything you think should be added to this sound off, don't worry i'll update it for future achievements no need to remind me