Whatsup gamerponies, you all know who I am, yet I know nothing about you, so I'm writing this guide to tell my story. On the off chance that there exists a bare addled few of you, who are uncertain as to my identity, then firstly I must ask what rock you've been living under champ, because I hate to brag, but I'm a pretty big deal around here and secondly, ill assert that I am Sir Licksalot! Gentle philanderer, a wily child connoisseur and a man on a mission to take vengeance upon those who have wronged my beloved seal.

I figure that this guide will be a Book Of Grudges of sorts, where I record every single naughty thing that the Curbstomping OP coalition did to Caitlin, during their rampant acts of blackmail and extortion. For those who don't know, Curbstomping OP, killed Caitlin, my beloved 16 year old girlfriend, who knew me for a week and a half and loved everything about me. Now, while I'm at the lowest I've ever been in life, they seek to kill me. Combing through every district in Ponyville, shotguns in hand, peering through the windows of every abode, until they find me and put my head on a mantlepiece. A big trophy to laud at and boast to guests over. Well I won't stand for it! You may have struck a telling blow, BUT YOU HAVE NOT COWED THE LION! RARGHHH, RARGHHH! I should like to add that Ill gradually add more to this guide as time passes, and when I recall more tragic events they made her do. All drawings are courtesy of the unwilling illustrators, who I coerce into contributing to this manuscript.