"My hips ached, my shoulders and back burned under the weight of my gear. My throat was dry from the sand and panting as I scaled the huge mound to the tower we'd been forbidden to return fire at until now.
"Haddock!" I heard from the top of the Hydra. A Chimera with all the troop capacity replaced with everything needed to support the quadruple barrel flak cannon upon which my direct superior officer now reclining as if he were on some Terran Chaise Loungé.

"Paint me like one of yer girls, Haddock!" he yells as I get closer, I can see him peering over the top of his aviators in a crude parody of flirtation.

I realise, if I leave him there, maybe his skin will fuse to the armour under the hot sun and he'll need to be pried off like a Throne Burger™.
"