GOOD
You should be, because this game is the most b*tchin' thing there is. You OPENTTD newbies are gonna learn just what true pleasure is. Nothing in the entire world is comparable to the pure ecstasy found when playing this game. You know those horrible porn ads that advertise a game that will make you cu*m in seconds? THIS IS THAT GAME. YOU WILL C*M IN SECONDS. I mean, what does literally everyone want in their life? Correct, the answer is A KICK ASS TRANSPORTATION SIMULATION GAME FROM THE EARLY NINETIES. YOU KNOW YOU WANT IT. Nobody can resist the temptation of playing this game. It is just that good. But this game is far more than just that.

I am sure you are think "What? I can understand this game making me c*m, because it is just that good, but how will it make me reconsider my entire life, and possibly even life itself?" Well get ready for a shock b*tches, because your midlife crisis will be coming early.
This game is no more than pure genius. A true masterpiece hidden from those too ignorant to realize it, for this game is, in itself, life itself. You start the game, and you are nothing. You are an absolute nobody. You have no social status. You are not rich. You are not powerful. If you tried to simply speak to Bill Gates, he would spit on you. Yes, you are that much of a nobody. But are you going to sit back while you are spat upon by the masses? NO. You are going to do something about it. After all, nothing will happen if you just sit back waiting for life to take charge. You will only fall deep into debt, until under the pressure of bankruptcy, you will die. Thus, you find a way to change fate itself, by becoming a transportation god. You have nothing, but you are crafty. You exploit the banks into giving you the funds you need to start your business. You build a railway, you buy a train, you buy a bus to bring passengers to your train, and what do you know? You are now raking in the money. You can now tell the banks to f*ck themselves and their stupid loans. You are making money, you just have to wait until you have enough to buy another train. BUT WAIT! Are you the type of person to just sit around and wait? NO! You are the one who will take life by the horns and turn it into your b*tch. So you tell the bank to unf*ck itself, and you take out all the money you can. You know how to spend it properly. You make TEN more railways, buy TWENTY new trains. Make more buses than you can even count. You are making more money than you could have ever dreamed of a year ago. Nothing can stop you. You pay back your loan and once again tell the bank to f*ck itself in its wrinkled rusted rural country assh*le, and you drop your mic as you leave. You don't need the bank, YOU ARE THE BANK. So you go back to Bill Gates, but HE STILL SPITS ON YOU. HOW COULD THIS BE. YOU ARE A TRUE TRANSPORTATION MOGUL. HOW DARE HE DISRESPECT YOU? But as Bill Gates walks away, you notice something. Bill Gates gets on his own private plane and leaves you there, stranded on the ground, no way to fly. You now know what you must do. You no longer have any need to worry about money, so you make the decision to open up your own airports, you buy your own planes, and you begin to soar. You feel free as a bird, unrestricted by the paltry force of gravity. You have overcome the planet your self. Soon, your few planes turn to dozens, then hundreds. You have more planes than any other company on earth. You are the richest person alive. You are the god of your own world, and nothing can change that. You once again confront Bill Gate, and this time, he looks you in the eye. You say no words, there is no need. You are the master now. Slowly, Bill Gates approaches you. He takes something out of his pocket and attaches it to your chest. It is a name tag with the words Bill Gates on it. You have been given the torch. You have become Bill Gates. As the previous Bill Gates vanishes from reality, you stop to wonder, why? Why have I done this? What have I become? And now you know what it truly means to be Bill Gates. There is no one above you. No one to look up to. No one to strive for. The only thing left is yourself, and for the first time in years, you think back upon the days when you started your small transportation company. You had only one train, only one bus, but at that moment, it seemed like enough. Now that you have everything, you know that you truly have nothing. You are truly alone. It does not take long for the pressure to build. You have achieve your life's dream. There is no more reason to live. You just hope that someone out there will remember the you that existed long ago, nothing more than a dreamer, but then again, a dream is all you needed to live. You have come to terms with your life, and as you make your final choice, you smile, for you know that no matter what, you could not have been satisfied with your life.

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