Many people around the world wonder what it would be like to be a transformer, and now thanks to the wonders of modern medicine, you can experience that way of life in just a few easy steps! Below is a step by step guide on how to transform into an alternate mode just like your favourite Transformers characters!

You have free reign in this section to break your legs however you see fit, just make sure they don't snap off completely! Once they are broken, please do not attempt to bandage or heal any of the wounds; if you see or smell blood, please ignore it.

This is where things get tricky. Now you must master the art of contorting your body into ungodly shapes matching those of the desired form you wish to turn into. For this example, I will be basing my body contortions off of the Autobot leader, Optimus Prime. I begin by grabbing my dead, limp legs and wrapping them together behind me, keeping them locked in as my torso sits up straight and acts as the front of the truck.

It's your choice! Experiment!

• You may pass out from the pain, it is recommended you don't do this
  
• Making the transformation noise with your mouth may help
  
• The hospital is your enemy
  
• If you're not in pain at any point during this exercise, you're doing it wrong

Use your newfound vehicular abilities to disguise yourself, trick your friends, or get the man/woman/nb of your dreams. Thanks for reading!