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How to name American Cars and Companies for Non-Americans
By Silverado Legion
Made an american car but don't know what to name your company and car model? This guide is for you!
   
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The Company™
The steps to naming your company:
Step 1
Have the name be
  • A word or words that makes you sound smart when you really aren't (e.g. Altervas Hydrocars)
  • A word that is a name (e.g. Ford)
  • A word that makes your company sound like a company with good intentions when it really doesn't (e.g. integrity)
  • A phrase that literally states what your company does (e.g. Boring Company (one of Elon Musk's companies. Bores tunnels))
  • An uncreative and dumb sounding name (e.g. company)
  • A kinda cute word or words (e.g. chocolatey cars)
  • A stupid made up word (e.g. Edgenunity)
Step 2
Then add either
  • company
  • industries
  • motors
  • corporation
  • research
  • labs
  • incorporated
  • or nothing
    to the end.
    Step 3
    To further sell it, add

  • ®
  • ©
Boom! Company name done!
The Model
To name your car model, name it in a way that makes you sound smart and when you really aren't. Also has to sound unique when it really isn't.
Example: Prius
Another Example: Altervas

Then simply say "The all new (year) (car name) (car type) from (company name)"
Example: the all new 2059 Altervas Sedan from Altervas Hydrocars Industries ©

Boom! Model name complete!
Adding on
Company Model/Motto
Make your model/motto something that makes your company sound like a good company when it really has evil intentions.
For example, you can make your model Embrace Extend Extinguish (microsoft) but in public documents and everywhere that anyone except your company can see purposefully forget to say Extinguish. (also microsoft) Remember to include all three Es in company emails (again microsoft)
Basically, a deceptive motto.

Anything else I should add?

Give yourself awards
You can further make your company successful by giving yourself JD power awards (Chevy) and say you are better than everyone else when you really aren't (Ford).
Something you should read after the rest
This guide may have made your perception of American companies really bad, but this guide is mostly for the funnies as american companies sometimes do just do what I have said in this guide. But please do not hate american companies. Companies like Apple, Microsoft, Amazon, Tesla, Disney, not facebook :bobtrollface:, are really good companies. Although Disney does have an Embrace Extend Extinguish model :bobtrollface:
1 Comments
Just Ryan 18 Mar, 2021 @ 11:03am 
do one for japenese companys