So, you want to make your teammates rage and want to vote kick you for fun? You want to play engineer at the same time? Not to worry! This handy little guide will teach you all the tricks you forgot as you stopped being ♥♥♥♥ at the game!

For best effects try doing all of these things at once (if possible).

Note, some of these steps require another engineer, usually a good one, to be on the same team as you.

Using the gunslinger builds smaller, more useless mini-sentries that aren't particularly good for anything. That's why you should always use them. Especially on defense in Control Point maps. Furthermore, if a big sentry engineer is on the same team as you, put your mini-sentry in the best sentry spots possible, so he can't put his sentry there.

This works best with another engineer on your team. Take all the metal and don't share any with the other engineer. Sharing is for ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. Also, if your engi buddy has a Level 1 dispenser and is trying to use the metal to upgrade his other buildings, take the metal. He won't mind. This is most effective while wielding the gunslinger.

Only pay attention to your buildings. Another engineer's sentry have 20 hp left? Keep hitting your mini sentry and hope something happens. His sentry being sapped? Like it matters. It's his fault he got backstabbed. His sentry under attack? ♥♥♥♥ him. He can build it again. This is crucial in keeping your buildings alive.

If you have 2 engineers, and the other engineer has already taken that award-winning sentry spot, don't take that lying down. Build your sentry next to his. This increases their firepower and thus their effectiveness. Works well with mini-sentries as well.

Is that engineer getting alot of points for being a good engineer and setting up a sentry nest? Who says you can't do that too? Put all your ♥♥♥♥ in that small enclosed space instead of putting it in a different spot. Use to greater effect by doing this on CP maps.

If you find any other engineers on your team, make sure to build a dispenser right in front of his sentry's line of sight, this way you will protect it from most incoming damage and make it nearly invincible

Bullets and missiles should go through your dispenser, creating a perfect nest, totally

Using a gunslinger for this isn't exactly required but can be more effective. Remember: your team doesn't need dispensers or teles. So don't build them. You need more metal for your sentry.

Just forget you can rotate buildings with m2. It's easier just to put the sentry down. The sentry rotates either way, so it can still shoot stuff. You should really just take off the m2 on your mouse, all it does is waste time. If you rotate ♥♥♥♥, you're just a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ who wants your team to lose, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.

No one wants to see where they're going after they leave a teleporter. So build your exit facing a wall (or better yet, a cliff). And if they start complaining, tell them to ♥♥♥♥ off and that they're lucky to have a tele anyways, ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.

Instead of building your dispenser in a place where yoiur teammates can use it, keep it to yourself, using it to get back your 3 metal you used to reload your sentry gun instead of using it to help your teammates. If teammates complain, tell them that your metal doesn't regererate on it's own and that they should just get a medic while you're one of 5 engineers on your team.

Increases crit chance by 200% and gives you +300 health. It also causes sentries to be able to do critical damage, dispensers to overheal infinitely and give you noclip, and critical teleports and teleport you onto the control point with uber and a pain train, regardless of class.

Equiping this allows you to build 4 more sentries and makes rockets from level 3 sentries homing rockets. It also allows all 5 of your sentries to nullify any buffs that the other team has. Scouts with the bonk? Dead. Ubered medics? Dead. Cloaked spies? Dead. There is really no reason to not wear this unless you want to be bad.

The Spy's only job is to be your friend. If you encounter a disguised spy, don't do anything. He is only there to help you and exists for your benefit. If he backstabs you, don't mind him, he wants you to respawn with full metal so you can build more ♥♥♥♥. And don't mind if he saps your sentry, it refills its ammo and give it 100% crits for 2 hours straight. If you kill that spy, you're hindering your own team's progress.

This is a wrangler. This increases your firing speed and lets you take control of the sentry. This increases your damage output exponentially with the sentry. So of course you should always use it.
Always. Never leave your sentry to do anything else in case someone walks by and is vulnerable to your super sentry.

If you are for some reason NOT using the wrangler to pwn n00bs, use your wrench. It has the highest crit chance in the entire game, so go out there and put those heavies in their place.

Use it. Always. if for some reason you are NOT using your wrench or wrangler.

It doesn't matter how many points your team has captured. You just can't be bothered to move up your stuff. Keep your stuff at last to make sure no one spawn camps you or backcaps instead of being useful and building your stuff where your teams needs it.

Team complaining that there's no teleporter? Tell them to go engineer and build one. It's not your fault. Teammate blaming you for not building a sentry and not helping them defend last point? Tell them you were upgrading your teleporter entrance. It's not your fault. Your sentry base die because you built it in the stupidest place imaginable? ♥♥♥♥♥ to your team for not supporting you. IT'S NOT YOUR FAULT.

1. Wrangle your sentry and waste ammo.

2. Practice your wrangler jumping skills you're bound to need in pubs.

3.Build tele exit and entrance next to each other. Use constantly. Rack up points. Top score.

4. Stand on sentry. Taunt forever until you win the round.

5. Spycheck everyone who comes out of spawn.

6. GOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMGOTTAMOVE THAT GEAR UP.

7. Hit your sentry with your wrench constantly. Something interesting is bound to happen.

8. Build. Upgrade. Destroy. Repeat.

9. Go AFK. Nothing bad can happen. Your team doesn't need you anyways.

10. Complain in the chat (or better yet, over microphone) how boring playing engineer is.

Valve didn't tell anyone this, but if an enemy is hit in the explosion of a building destroyed by the engineer, it does the same damage as a taunt kill and doesn't let them respawn, so use this super secret pro strat only 4 da best (copyright 1346) constantly.

And that's it. If you do this and are on the same server for and hour or more, you're doing something wrong. And remember: It's not autism if you like it.