The pornstash: The thing that makes us human. Scholars since time immemorial have recited this. Philosophers have continued to base their ideas around this. In the end, I can't say whether these people are right or wrong. I can say, however, that a proper folder of this importance needs some security.


First off, what not to do:



As we see here, this person does not care about his folder and - by extension - his humanity. Fret not! The precautions we can take are simple and effective for shared computers and restrained users alike.

The amount of folders one should use is subjective, but do note that a long folder does not innately mean a safe one. Because of this, I recommend adding branching paths to your folder (essentially making it a maze), adding plenty of dead ends, or, if you're so inclined, you can try adding a ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ of folders, so no crazed soul but your own would even dare attempt to find your Lucky Charms. This, of course, has little value without at least one of the other techniques.


As you can see, the directory is a little suspect.

A file hidden ten feet underground will generally be harder to spot as a sexytime folder than one in plain sight with 13 notes on it saying it, as a matter of fact, is not what it looks like. Seasoned veterans of the art of hiding their stuff will probably direct students to using the Appdata folder:


Normally, though, this folder is hidden from plain view (which is why it's such a good place to put your ♥♥♥♥). In order to see it, you'll need to jump through some hoops. I will be describing one way to do it in Windows 10, but the process remains almost the same for Windows 7 and up.

First, click "File" at the top left of any File Explorer window. Hit "Change folder and search options." In the new window, click the "View" divider around the top. Finally, check the bubble next to "Show hidden files, folders, and drives." Hit "OK" and you're done.



Note: There's a reason the folder was hidden, but that's not important.

The folder is located under Disk > Users > [your profile] > Appdata .

Generally, most folders will accept your currently-homeless filth folder, though I have heard from many an expert that they enjoy using folders for programs they don't have anymore (for example, you could use the husk of a now-defunct soundboard software you may have lying around). Another option is to hide it within one of the many folders in Appdata that hold save data for your games. The data usually doesn't mind the company. And you better bet your sweet bippy the possibilities don't stop there.

The third fairy in this quest is known simply as "Red herrings." This fairy is very important. Treat her well.
At this point, naming and adding to your now-buried-under-a-hidden-folder-and-2-pages-of-directory weiner pleaser may seem superfluous. In any case, adding a little creativity isn't against the rules, so let's dive right in.

Placing red herrings around your stash can serve you well in the long run. These fish can act as virtual landmines, exploding and dissuading pesky peepers from entering your domain, your individuality, your humanity. The kinds of fish you want to place will vary by location, but we can get a good idea of it from some examples.


If you are using a save-data or software folder, you can add things one might typically see in those kinds of folders. Take this folder for Source Live Audio Mixer, for instance:


Looks fine, right?


Uh-owoh.
The "owo" could signify the path to your lewds. Or it could serve as a file with nothing in it. You could even replace the "owo" with something you would think to find in the folder (in this case, in the "ui" folder. Renaming it may be a better bet). The possibilities, people! They're endless!

The humanity we all share is something that should be buried in a safe on a remote island nation. I hope I helped you bury yours. These techniques are what one will find in a basic 4-year course on the subject, although I would still recommend avid learners to take the actual classes and have the option for a higher degree. Next time, we'll look in-depth at intermediate masturbatory techniques (American Standard Curriculum).* Stay tuned, and stay classy.







*I won't be uploading masturbatory techniques here. Steam is a good Christian site for healthy Christian eyes.**
































**ok maybe just the squidward bit no more though