So a small battalion of sniopers has pinned you (and potentially a good portion of your comrades) down on the Oscar-winning, OG TF2 map 2fort, forcing you to choose between certain death above ground, or the slightly less dangerous sewers.

♥♥♥♥ the sewers. No one uses the sewers.

Going subterranean may sound okay, but you're sure to get homesick with subterranean blues down there. Sewers smell odious. Sewers are where ♥♥♥♥ comes from. You're not escaping the law; you're better than that, and your route to that sweet mannrobics party in the other team's base should reflect that.

If you're ready to go full chad, you'll need the following:

1. The Fists of Steel
   
   These little beauties are the bread and butter of this operation;
   without them, snipers could simply spit in your direction and headshot your fistless behind. Keep your caboose fully fisted with significant reduction in damage taken from ranged sources. Those filthy guttersnipers are a thing of the past!
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
   
2. The Dalokohs Bar
   
   As a heavy weapons guy, a fully charged poke from shooty mc ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ will often still kill those educated enough to be equipped with the cheap intellectuals' choice, the fists of steel.
   
   Enter the dalokohs bar.
   
   With this nutritious slab of processed cacao, you get enough health (albeit temporary) to - with the fists of steel brandished - survive the uranium-tipped bullets of the beloved Austro-Hungarian snipemaster.
   
   
   
   With these two common household items, you can become the bane of many 2fort snipers' existences. Yipee.

You're ready.

Break out your most bilious canister of Bud Light, recline, and execute.

To perform this expert move with the best results, do this:

1. position your fat heavy ass behind cover on the balcony of your team's fort.
   
2. consume chocolate.
   
3. put on your steel-suede gloves.
   
4. run out of cover, allowing snipers to attack you. This step can be done in a number of ways: you can run traceably across the balcony between covers, or you can hug one spot for cover, get literally noscope headshot, and run back to your hidey hole. The choice is yours. Note, though, that one plan here may be better against certain breeds of snipers than another plan.
   
5. eat plenty of your superior organic, free-trade, gluten free comestible until you are in perfect health again.
   
6. repeat steps 1-5 until the sniper focused on you is killed or leaves the game

This tactic is also perfect for completing that one heavy objective for the banana. Heck, you might want to see just how much damage one can really take in TF2 via sniper. When doing this, also remember to be creative! Use a moving taunt, have a medic heal you from safety, or just use a bind whenever the snipey boy hits you and wonders how you didn't die. The possibilities are truly endless. Happy 2forting!