Yummy burrito / out from the microwave come. / Boiling lava!
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"#14 +(2186)- [X]<watashi-x> Oh my God! Are you attemping to DoS me?

<Polymer> WTF are you talking about dumb ass

<Polymer> I can't get into your MS-DOS
#72 +(8006)- [X]<reptile-> The first time hypr opened a box of Cheerios and looked inside he yelled, "OH WOW! DONUT SEEDS!"

<hypr> wtf are donut seeds
#386 +(566)- [X]<_scar_> hm I've been 16 the last 3 years on irc heh
#1574 +(666)- [X]<jessafk> ;) your just too smart for me

<tress> you're grammar astounds me
#1825 +(2816)- [X]<madthink> what does putting sugar in someones gas tank do

<maff> I heard when you start the engine cinnamon rolls come out

<maff> with frosting and everything

<madthink> i need to get revenge in the worst way

<maff> cinnamon rolls arent really revenge
#2238 +(596)- [X]<DrWoody> List of things I have accomplished today:

<DrWoody> ...

<DrWoody> ...

<DrWoody> That is all.
#2512 +(1182)- [X]<`michael> pink floyd - wish you were here is the best ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ song

<w3nisT> i disagree while it is a very good song I think the donkey kong theme song is better
#3584 +(262)- [X]MrProgrmmr: I want to encode my sperms DNA with the DeCSS code, that way when I jack off, I'd be breaking the law
#7276 +(671)- [X]( Fuzzy     ) like flicking through his images dir

( Lev       ) oh i thought you said "licking"

( Lev       ) how peculiar

( Teddy     ) Lev: is there something on your mind?

( Teddy     ) you seem a little pre-occupied...

( Lev       ) wouldn't you lick to find out
#7301 +(237)- [X]<HA|MI-Edam> I read about this guy, and he was having sex with a girl, and his, you-know-what sorta like, spontaniously combusted

<EvilMonkey> ...

<DrWoody> Started on FIRE?

<MI-Edam> no, exploded

<MI-Edam> They say it was under so much pressure or something

<DrWoody> AHHHHHHHHH

<EvilMonkey> wt im never having sex!

<Suzie> your missing out

<EvilMonkey> missing out on having my mangina explode?

<EvilMonkey> no thanks
#8074 +(355)- [X]<Q-Ball> Average Ejaculatory Speed

<Q-Ball> 28 miles per hour (45 km/hr).

<Q-Ball> you could kill a small mammal with that
#9528 +(-97)- [X]<lurtz_the_orc> i did not know how stupid someone can be that actullay read LOTR so right know i do not know
#11455 +(38)- [X]<Reipin> I do makeit quite obvious I want nothign to do with them

<Reipin> and I have had quite a few call me an ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥

<Reipin> just cause a guy is gay doesn't mean he can't fight back
#11718 +(191)- [X]<SpecOps> my dad went to a Microsoft convention...he got a bunch of software for XP..Office XP, he also won a recliner, which was cool

<hmne> my dad went to a microsoft convention as well..all he got was a 200 dollar fine and a sore ass
#11784 +(501)- [X]<Dunrick> My iq is 20/20
#14799 +(567)- [X]<TsN|EvilMonkey> hmm

<TsN|EvilMonkey> im having an orgasm

<TsN|EvilMonkey> wtf
#15224 +(309)- [X]<Reiko> girl who sit on judges lap, get honorable discharge
#21282 +(447)- [X]<ChugChug> so like... uhh.. what language do you use?

<LaC> english

<ChugChug> is that like perl? :)

<LaC> god i hope not
#34089 +(370)- [X]<*kraken> oh

<*kraken> my

<*kraken> god

<*kraken> my mom sent me an email

<*kraken> and in it at one point she said

<*kraken> "i saw that they have personal ads on the internet...ever thought of placing one?"

<*kraken> THANKS MOM!
#36490 +(356)- [X]<aphr0> Type "incest rape" into the Google search engine, for example, and the first result is for the Rape, Abuse and Incest National Network (RAINN), a Washington nonprofit that aids sexual assault victims. The second result is for brutalextreme.com, which advertises its content as stories, pictures and videos of the "most violent rapes in the history of mankind."

<aphr0> is it wrong to laugh?

<Hawkeye^> no

<aphr0> k

<aphr0> then I'm clear
#38597 +(787)- [X]<JtotheD> do you even know what mecca is

<Loopy1> yea

<Loopy1> a robot that people fight in
#42100 +(128)- [X]<namesis> HELLO GUYS SPEAK ME ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ PLEASE AND FAST OR I LEAVE
#48293 +(199)- [X]<[smurf]> MelowRage: you are a sick, sick, sick child

<MelowRage> I know

<[smurf]> even the name MelowRage pisses me off

<[smurf]> it tears me

<MelowRage> SCORE

<[smurf]> I am seared

<MelowRage> I was hoping it would piss someone off

<[smurf]> SEARING RAGE OF MELLOWNESS

<MelowRage> what with the blatant misspelling and such

<MelowRage> It was either "MelowRage" or "MellowRag"

<[smurf]> it makes me want to flip out and listen to Jazz at the same time

<MelowRage> I chose the former

<MelowRage> hehehe

<MelowRage> VIOLENT JAZZ MUSIC!!!

<[smurf]> STOP IT

<[smurf]> HAVE YOU EVER FLIPPED OUT TO JAZZ CORPERAL?!

<[smurf]> IT'S NOT SOMETHING A GROWN MAN SHOULD DO!

<MelowRage> like a music video of some black dude going nuts and shoving his saxophone into a guy's eyeball

<[smurf]> ..nah

<[smurf]> that's rage

<[smurf]>mellow rage would be the Micheal Jackson video where they get all ready to knife fight and then they just dance with their hands together
#52477 +(246)- [X]Dr SpaZZo: Why the hell do they call it fox undercover when they just go up to the people on the street and go "WHY R U SWINDALING TEH COMMUN PUBLIK :-("
#59863 +(274)- [X]<phrenzy> i went to laser force yesterday all that cs made me really good

<a3LegdCat> so you camped like a mofo?
#68630 +(265)- [X]Kit-Fox> YAY! i found some food!

elroy{K}> yay! kill it!
#75145 +(816)- [X]<comet_11> Dj Sexual Innuendo is 'in' the 'house'
#75747 +(-29)- [X]( Keebs ) Sheri has a secret she needs to tell me.

( Keebs ) :|

( +[steev] ) shes prego

( Keebs ) [steev]: lol.... she's already got a kid.

( +[steev] ) shes prego again

( Keebs ) Nah.

( +[steev] ) she found someone else

( Keebs ) We never dated.

( +[steev] ) o wait, i know the secret

( +[steev] ) you are the father!

( Keebs ) We never ♥♥♥♥♥♥.

( +[steev] ) that you remember

( Keebs ) That I know of.

( Cosmok ) that would make a good bash

( Keebs ) Oh ♥♥♥♥
#79712 +(-58)- [X]<warpedminds> what do you call a barn full of black men

<warpedminds> -- antique farm equipment
#82164 +(123)- [X]<TonY> Hmm, can ya overclock boobies?

<Rifleman> yeah, tis called implants
#88572 +(192)- [X]<seeksama> i think my semen is the color of the last gatorade i drank

<seeksama> like thos commericials with the guys sweating red

<seeksama> i can ♥♥♥ red if i drink the right gatorade

<seeksama> or purple

<seeksama> it owns

<Mikelite> ...
#99374 +(1475)- [X]<Kokanshu> does anyone else have the urge to call the operators up and say 'I NEED AN EXIT, FAST!'
#100837 +(143)- [X]<cold_russian> i think... i just... blew up... the heater.
#104226 +(117)- [X]* Gandalf should answer the phones at work with a different song lyric each time

<Gandalf> "I'm the operator with my pocket calculator. May I please have your U* IT Name?"

<ai> I just want to answer the phone "♥♥♥♥ you, this is Ben, how can I help you?"

<Gandalf> heh :)

<ai> "I'd like to file a claim."  "Miss Scarlet, I don't know *nothin'* bout birthin' no babies!"
#106186 +(246)- [X][WaRe-WoLf] you know i gotta find a girl, get her pregnant so i can have a kid to dig around with those cables behind the tv
#107283 +(181)- [X]<KnacK|WorK> oximoron of the day "Microsoft To Teach Undergrads About Secure Computing"
#139541 +(202)- [X]<thebluetml> everyone doesn't like me

<thebluetml> so i told my mom

<thebluetml> and she said i was cool

<thebluetml> other than the fact i have glasses, acne and 6 fingers on my left hand.
#159585 +(322)- [X]- (JustHalf) #boards != warez?

- (kairo) try #boardz

- (kairo) if it ends in 'z' , its got"