"#58 +(1611)- [X]<disconect> Tekken and sex both give my hand a cramp if I do it for too long, though...
#1079 +(340)- [X](R0y-HR) i just mauled my cat and got static shock from her ear
#1423 +(646)- [X]<katers> my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ roommate

<katers> needs to stop being a ho

<katers> or cut me in on the action

<katers> one or the other.
#1640 +(1534)- [X]<Inoshiro> Wth

<Inoshiro> "Don't iron, don't put in a triangle, don't put in an oval"

<harb> Er?

<Inoshiro> Is there a translation table for the washing tag on clothing?
#3588 +(345)- [X]*** da-guvnor (~tonto@pc2-stoc4-0-cust224.mid.cable.ntl.com) Quit (If girls are made of sugar & spice......why do they taste of fish.)
#4329 +(619)- [X]*** @pHaT|B33R is now known as @pHaT|ZzZz

<@JumperXL> later

<@JumperXL> nite drunkard

<@ismell> l8

<@JumperXL> thats irc dedication. smashed off his gord but still changes his nick to ZzZz before he passes out.
#5757 +(1089)- [X]<bytraper> sheesh... I crashed the last company car I had :/

<bytraper> I pulled the sun visor down and a spider with 15 legs dropped from it

<girlie-> 15 legs.. lol

<Dark_un> thats almost 2 spiders
#7855 +(811)- [X]<octo> no matter what anyone tells you, or how much you think it would be a good idea, never ever put aftershave on your balls

<HeXeDeCiMaL> OMG 0 ...

<Angelhair> curiosity will get you every time

<Ninja_Bill> as far as i know curiosity didnt make a cat put aftershave on its nuts
#8264 +(1110)- [X]* fo0bar has silverware now

<jk> is that a new kind of heatsink?

<jk> :D

<fo0bar> no, it's a metal-based bio-nutritional transport system

<jk> the thing... you use to... dig... food.

<jwz> it's more of a food shim.

<fo0bar> appearantly the technology has been around for awhile, but I haven't been able to afford the genuine metal equipment...  I've had to use the plastic replicas

<fo0bar> though proper transport systems are appearantly a requirement when an xx chromosome pair is introduced into xy's atmosphere
#10481 +(349)- [X]<jej> i need to "find" a copy of q3a for os 9/X too.

<jej> and wolfenstein.

<Toast> I need to "find" a copy of "your mom" for "my wang"

<jej> ":("

<cj_> "hehe"
#12122 +(190)- [X]<]RS[Sleepy> See, Canadians might not have a powerful army, but we can have stable @#$%ing servers :D

<Daffelz> yeah because the one guy in your army is a computer whiz
#15450 +(296)- [X]<merl> in the UK things are generally pretty wet

<merl> we've adapted

<merl> webbed feet n ♥♥♥♥
#19131 +(1383)- [X]<LawrenceC> Some of us in another channel have come up with the perfect replacement for the Pledge of Allegiance!

<LawrenceC> You see, our genious plan was to take the Pledge of Allegiance, as it stands, and run it through Babelfish a few times.

<LawrenceC> So, after transating it to Spanish and back, then to Korean and back, we came up with:

* Jinnai|Shigoto fears lawrence's next statement :P

* Leliel also :P

<LawrenceC> "Me with the flag of United States of United States the republic which it stops, in the nation all for a loyalty, in freedom and process, it promised in the shoes lower part it will be able to divide c."

<Suika|away> divide c!

<Suika|away> that's so moving
#22046 +(97)- [X][4:02pm] <HandofErebus> i wish i could hit Edit>undo witha lot of things

[4:02pm] <HandofErebus> like when i was in on my mom nekid

[4:02pm] <HandofErebus> if only that damn edit>undo was right there
#24206 +(325)- [X]<JonJonB> <FantasyGa> coz if u want i have this free user and pass to a gay site

<Onyx> JonJonB: tell an Oper he's bothering you

<JonJonB> Not yet dude, I'm about to get a free pass to a gay...um yeah...oper...
#31324 +(362)- [X]<Dopefish> there is sometimes a denial stage in drinking

<Agg> no there isn't!
#35522 +(760)- [X]<_rm> xp is great

<_rm> better than ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ me or 98
#36275 +(280)- [X]<chikster> I am 15

<hardlined> 15 is prime age to start experimenting with anal sex.
#40108 +(271)- [X]<QuaKed_Oatmeal> i always wanted to be an evil genious\

<QuaKed_Oatmeal> ever since i saw all those james bond movies...

<Shatai> You could start by spelling genius right ;)

<QuaKed_Oatmeal> stfu
#42625 +(3)- [X]*** Quits: Noirgrim (I sold my kids for cheese)
#45581 +(469)- [X]* Joins: the-craft

* ChanServ sets mode: +v the-craft

<the-craft> thank you chanserv:-)

<the-craft> chanserv where are you from

<the-craft> hello

<the-craft> ?

* Parts: the-craft
#48202 +(318)- [X]<Scire> if Milla Jovavich was sucking me off, when I came in her mouth I'd scream, "BIG BA-DA-BOOM!"
#48290 +(177)- [X]<UFGailorJupiter> i'm going to go cleanse myself.

<UFGailorJupiter> i'll be bathing in the sacred hentai waters.

<UFGailorJupiter> well

<UFGailorJupiter> hentai game music waters.

<Bob_McBob> So what you mean is, you're going to download some porn and masturbate?

<UFGailorJupiter> Bob: YES!
#49019 +(293)- [X]<fahd> anyone want to volunteer with me at the retirement home

<d3> hell no fahd

<d3> have fun cleaning up 93 year old feces

<fahd> no

<fahd> just to talk to them

<fahd> entertain them

<fahd> and maybe get laid
#53567 +(125)- [X][+   oracel] my exam went well =)

[@   zipper] My job searching didn't.

[@   zipper] Going to go out with a friend and do a coop search wednesday. :o

[@   zipper] Multiplayer job searching > Single player
#54531 +(520)- [X]<HistoryHm> well, i could never date her 

<HistoryHm> three strikes rule 

<HistoryHm> republican 

<HistoryHm> christian 

<unga-work> conscious
#54801 +(8)- [X]<NIH> Dec 12 1917

<NIH> The worst train wreck in history, leaving 543 Frenchmen dead.

<NIH> Worst... or best?
#56074 +(1409)- [X]<@exit2eden9> my mother just told me the funniest story ever

<@exit2eden9> she was in the supermarket before, and this person in front of her was fighting with her toddler...who kept taking candy off the rack and putting it in the cart...

<@exit2eden9> she was saying "no...you cannot have candy...it is almost dinner time and you cant have any"  and this is going on for a while

<@exit2eden9> so the kid yells really loud:

<@exit2eden9> "if you dont let me have candy im gonna call gramma and tell her you had daddy's peepee in your mouth"

<@exit2eden9> the woman ran out of the store...left all her groceries there
#56350 +(71)- [X]<Siron> the bathroom is full and i gotta go..

<neural> well there is that bush

<neural> and that.. corner

<phyrearms> siron just point it spray it under the door
#62847 +(115)- [X]<Muzzle79> i'm so poor that we make the koolaid with water, then steal a bunch of sugar packets from restraunts so that we can add sugar to each glass...

<Astanix> lol

<Astanix> awesome

* Muzzle79 is serious.. i've done it before..

<Muzzle79> lol

<Jerki1989> im so poor i cant even afford to go to the restraunt to steal sugar....

<Muzzle79> by restraunts i mean

<Muzzle79> arbys
#72721 +(434)- [X]<Pyrate> I was downloading a hentai game, but it was slowing down my Harry Potter download, so I canceled it... I think I may be a little retarded
#73169 +(872)- [X]<D-BOY> MK, you shouldn't assume so much

<chockoman> YEAH

<chockoman> YOU KNOW WHAT ASSUMING DOES

<chockoman> IT MAKES AN ASS OUT OF YOU

<chockoman> AND SOME GUY NAMED MING
#84115 +(273)- [X]<Zedium> Sim Life

<Zedium> Pretend to have a life

<The_Cat> dude, that's what IRC is for
#100017 +(145)- [X]<Coota> Hmmm... I'm in a dilemma. I'm in love with accents, especially British ones, but I don't like fat girls. Now, the girl who wants to make out with me *does* have an accent, but she is a little overweight..."