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Oh, every time I think about old Ronald McDonald I just get so ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ rock hard. Ever since I was 6, I’ve had the hots for him. Everything about him is perfect. I want to wake up chained to my bed, with that pale face smiling down at me, while slowly shoving chicken nuggets up my ass. I want the Hamburgler to steal my ♥♥♥ just like he steals hamburgers. I want Grimace to eat my ass so hard, trying to get at the chicken nuggets left by Ronald. All the while Ronald is standing above me, forcing his two foot horse ♥♥♥♥ down my throat. I want to choke on it, as the Big Mac secret sauce consumes my existence.

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