I was in my class and when I saw this profile I had to start furiously masturbating, all my classmates and the teacher gave me strange looks saying things like “what the hell?” and “are you okay man?", I dropped my phone and everyone saw this magnificent profile, now the whole class is masturbating together because of you. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this.

After a good game in csgo, i added him because he seemed like a cool guy. We got chatting, over the next couple of months we became good friends. Lots of banter, lots of great CS and most importantly true friendship.
I invited him to my house for a csgo lan party. He said he was coming so i was looking forward to meeting him in real life.
When he arrived at my house, he pushed me against the wall and started nibbling my ear, i felt his hard wiener push against my leg. I punched him and then 1 tapped him. Turns out he was gay. Don't trust this guy.

This profile gave me:

AIDS
allergies
Alzheimer's disease
anxiety disorders
arthritis
asthma
astigmatism
autoimmune diseases
benign prostate hyperplasia (BPH)
bipolar disorder (manic-depressive)
brain cancer
breast cancer
cancer
candidiasis
cataracts
celiac disease
cervical cancer
constipation
common cold
COPD
cough
Crohn's disease
cystic fibrosis
dementia
diabetes
diarrhea
depression
ebola
eczema
endometriosis
epilepsy
eye disorders
fibroids
herpes
high cholesterol
HIV
Hodgkin's disease
kidney disease
lactose intolerance
leukemia
liver cancer
liver disease
meningitis
meningococcal disease
menopause
mental illness
myopia (short-sightedness)
obesity
osteoporosis
otitis media (middle ear infection)
ovarian cancer
pain
Parkinson's disease
pelvic inflammatory disease
pertussis
pregnancy
Raynaud's Phenomenon
SARS
Seizures
sleep disorders
smoking
stroke
thrush
thyroid disorders
warts
whooping cough

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