北 烬
MR M   Balbriggan, Dublin, Ireland
 
 
"There is a girl who was born in the royal "

"As an old ballad goes"

"She is the most beautiful girl in the royal"

"She lives every night in a stone castle"

"Sleep alone"

"Any sound that awakens even the dead"

'You can't wake her up"
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45 Hours played
ALL ABOUT THE WORLD AND YOU

Breaking character just for this review and this review alone. All my other reviews are jokes.

How do you make a funny joke about something you genuinely love?
I'm a very detrimentally masculine person, and this wrangled tears out of me not one but FIVE times.

Everything that this game had shown in media is bait. 2b's huge butt and sultry thighs? Bait. PLATINUM game's fantastic combat? Bait. The 6 hours of one of the most dynamic and well composed music ever put into a video game (excluding DOOM 2016 for completely different reasons)? BAIT. Everything this game shows off lures you in for what will really draw you in: emotional connection to EVERY character with more than five seconds of screen time. It helps that the gameplay in-between REEKS of polish.

This game will require multiple playthroughs, but trust me when I say none are truly doing the same thing again, and that you should absolutely sit down and experience every single (main) ending this game has to offer. You will feel burnt out and think, "is it really worth it to play through this game two more times when I could probably look up the endings on YouTube or a wiki site?" And the answer is yes. Yes Yes yes. As soon as you start the second you will understand and by the end of your second you will be HOOKED.

If you are also a fan of the drakengard series or the original Nier, this is a MUST BUY at any price.
If you are new to the series, do not be afraid for this to be your jumping in point.

Only concerns I have are with some performance for a select few players but at the time of writing this(4/3/17) the devs have said it was being addressed.

This game is best played with a controller, but keyboard is VERY usable.

(Again, I know this review isn't funny, but I'm not talented enough to turn a from the heart recommendation into a joke.)


Tl;dr came for the butt, stayed for the immense emotional attachment (much like someone I know, you know who you are)


This is an emotional review written just after completing the game and spending 37 hours in it.
This is how you make a slasher game.
This is how you make epic fight scenes.
This is how you write beautiful music.
This is how you write a story.
This is how you bring something new into the genre.
This is how you make somebody cry.
This is how you make a masterpiece.
This is one of the best games I've ever played, just make sure to make it through to the very end.

Glory to Mankind.
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