(Part 1/2) +Rep 10/10, Great friendly player. I met this guy in an Inferno game, he was on the opposing team. He kept one tapping my head, blindly hitting me through smoke and flashes, and tracing me through walls. I was convinced he was hacking so I sent him a friend request to call him a virgin to his face.

He politely let me know he has had sex before and also educated me that he wasn't hacking, and that I was just bad at CS, pointing to the fact that I bought my knife instead of unboxing it like a man. I exclaimed that there's no way he could've gone 43-1 in a game without hacking, so he invited me to watch the replay with him so that he could point out my flaws and show how he's just good.

(Part 2/2) After watching the replay, I realized I was in fact just playing awfully and he was very very good. He had the game sense of a pro and the aim of a 12 year old on Adderall after snorting a Chug Jug. He gave me some amazing tips like "Just stop dying /forehead" and when I complained about enemies one tapping me, he said "Just don't have such a big head". Ever since I started listening to him, I could feel myself getting better at the game.

Now I'm paying him $25 per month to carry me to Global Elite (where I rightfully belong). He still has moments where he traces someone through a wall and then immediately headshots them as they turn the corner, but now I know he's actually just really good and not a hacker. I highly recommend sending him a friend request and letting him help you get better. Otherwise, you'll just have to face the fact that you're a hardstuck silver 2 who can't do anything except rush with a P90. I'd let him ♥♥♥♥ my wife.

It's not the size of your hammer that matters. Its all about the strength and force you generate in the swing.

♥♥♥♥♥ OUT FOR ICE HARAMBE

yall follow my twitter

thanks babe <3