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I sexually identify as an Attack Helicopter. Ever since I was a boy I dreamed of soaring over the oilfields, dropping hot sticky loads on disgusting foreigners. People say to me that a person being a helicopter is impossible and I'm mentally ill, but I don't care, I'm beautiful. I'm having a plastic surgeon install rotary blades, 30 mm cannons and AGM-114 Hellfire missiles on my body. From now on, I want you guys to call me "Apache" and respect my right to kill from above and kill needlessly. If you can't accept me, you're a heliphobe and need to check your vehicle privilege. Thank you for being so understanding.
⠄⠄⢠⢾⢵⣗⣷⣿⣻⣿⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧
⠄⣴⡫⣗⢽⡺⡽⣞⣯⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇
⢸⣿⡯⣪⡣⡫⡯⣯⣷⣿⣟⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄
⢸⣿⣿⣢⢫⣝⢾⣯⣿⣷⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⣿⣿⣷⢀⣄
⠈⣿⣿⣯⢧⣳⣻⣺⡻⣽⠝⢋⠁⠒⢚⣓⣿⣿⡿⢿
⠄⢹⣿⣏⠄⠄⢀⠄⡘⣾⣷⣦⣪⣳⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣽
⡫⡾⣿⡯⣮⣢⢶⢵⢼⣽⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠋
⠑⡢⢿⣿⣳⢽⢝⡷⣵⣷⣿⠿⢷⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢧
⠄⠘⠞⣿⣷⢽⢵⣳⠵⠐⢑⠙⡚⠿⣿⣿⡿⢝⠜⡄
⠄⠄⠄⠘⣟⣿⣽⡞⣡⢒⠓⠝⣙⣓⣪⡻⠝⡀⣼⣷⡤⣠⣤
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠙⢷⢝⢧⢲⢎⠳⠹⠱⣹⡱⠈⠂⣰⣿⣿⣳⠄⢤
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣧⣃⠄⠑⠕⠒⡚⠝⠁⢀⢜⣾⣟⣯⡒⡀⡘
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠘⣷⢢⢠⢀⣀⠄⡄⡖⡵⣯⣿⡽⣧⡳⢐⠔
⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠐⠄⠘⢯⡪⡪⡢⡣⣱⢽⢝⣯⡷⣻⣵⣟⢔⠅
⠅⠁⣀⣤⣤⣄⣀⠈⠄⠁⠄⠁⡮⠄⠁⠄⠄⡠⠶⠶⠦⡀⠈
⠁⠄⠔⠒⠭⠭⠥⠥⠓⠄⢀⣴⣿⡄⠁⠠⣤⠉⠉⣭⠝⠈⢐
⢄⡰⡢⡙⠄⠠⠛⠁⢀⢔⣵⣿⣿⣿⣧⣄⡈⠁⠈⠁⠉⡹⣽
⣿⣿⣬⣭⡭⠔⣠⣪⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣵⡒⠫⠿⣿
⣿⠿⣛⣥⣶⣿⠟⢁⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⡙⣿⣿⣶⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡫⠁⢀⠑⠓⠫⢝⢟⣿⣿⣿⡻⠊⢉⣄⠈⠪⡫⢿
⣿⣿⣿⢟⠁⣰⣿⣿⣢⢤⣀⡀⠉⠉⢀⠠⠪⢝⡻⣷⡀⠊⡪
⣿⣿⣿⡊⢠⣿⣿⡫⠚⣊⣡⠶⣤⣤⠶⠞⡛⠳⣌⠫⡻⡀⠈
⢟⡿⣕⠁⡫⠝⠊⡴⠋⠁⠁⠐⠂⠈⠐⠈⠈⠐⠐⠳⠄⠹⣇
⠕⡪⢕⢀⠞⠁⠄⣁⢀⢀⣀⣤⣠⣀⣤⣴⣶⣶⣶⡆⠄⠆⢷
⠄⠁⠄⡎⠄⠁⢬⣮⣕⠻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡫⡪⡵⠄⠁
⠄⠁⠄⡣⠄⠁⣷⣯⣵⣢⠄⠄⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⣠⣬⣟⡕⠄⠁
⣷⠁⠄⡎⠄⠁⠻⣿⣾⣯⣪⣔⣀⣀⣀⡠⣶⣾⣽⣿⠃⠄⢀
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…….…………………….¸„-^"¯( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ¸-¯"¯/'
……………………¸„„-^"¯ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡'\¸„„,-"
**¯¯¯'^^~-„„„----~^*'"¯ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡¸-"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)„-^" : ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡„-"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ¸„-^¯
( ͡° ͜ʖ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) ¸„„-^¯
:.' : : '\ ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)¸„„-~"
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°):"-„""***/*'ì¸'¯
:.':( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡:"-„ ( ͡° ͜ʖ\
.( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° \,
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ 'Ì
( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ/
"-„_::::_„-*__„„~