Hey Champ

Mom says you got rejected by a girl today? Wanna talk about it with your old man?

Look bud, the truth is your adopted. You’re getting older and I’m sure you’ve noticed you look nothing like your mother and me.

Your birth mother was a grotesque, beast of a woman who conceived you in the bathroom of a Rite-Aid. The police found you in a dumpster behind her apartment building.

Anyways champ, you’re gonna get rejected a lot. You can’t take it so personally. There’s beautiful people and then there’s ugly people.

I’m glad we had this talk buddy. If you ever need anything let me know. Unless it costs money if that’s the case ask your mother ha!

Night, big guy! Love ya.

where are the beans

I found the beans