This is a personalized message from the Federal Bureau of Investigation. We are pleased to inform you that you have been removed from our watchlist, and that you are no longer being monitored 24/7. Your actions have reassured us, and we no longer suspect that you are a potential risk to society or anyone around you. Due to the fact that you have not been searching up concerning topics on the internet related to mass killings and shootings, you are now cleared of any suspicion. If this information is incorrect, please contact a representative of the Federal Bureau of Investigation at once to address this matter by calling (310) 477-6565.

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(Soul Music)

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This is an automated message sent by the Federal Bureau of Investigation. We are to inform you that you are now on a watchlist, and that you are to be monitored 24/7 as of now. Your actions have concerned us, and we are in suspicion that you are a potential risk to society and anyone around you. Due to the fact that you often search up various topics on the internet that concern mass killings and shootings, you are now labeled as a could-be terrorist. Here are the various things you have searched up in the past months. If you have not searched up any of these topics, please contact a representative of the Federal Bureau of Investigation at once to fix this major error by calling (310) 477-6565.