I gave birth as a man and it was incredible. I stole a chicken egg and then planted that egg inside my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ and kept it there for several weeks to keep it warm. This magical process of bringing a fluffy chick into the world is a well-kept secret. You just have to loosen your ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ with a dildo for several months so that it becomes big enough to keep an egg inside without breaking it. You also need to constantly lubricate the egg and the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ in order to prevent your butthole from accidentally breaking the egg when squeezing your ass from the constant gay thoughts generated from having a ♥♥♥♥-shaped egg massage your butthole. Then you do that until the egg hatches, and voila! The unparalleled joy of giving birth as a man is a transcendent experience. You should definitively try it. It's totally not gay at all.

+rep Very good survivor was only let down by their team glad i was your killer GG

wassup bbg

Sitting on a toilet's seat that is still warm from the last person is the closest I’ve come to physical contact with another human in 10 years.
Sometimes when I’m feeling really alone I’ll stroll down to the nearby park/Library and read a book with an eye on the bathroom. If someone enters and is in there for more than 3 minutes I mark my spot with a bookmark and patiently wait for them to exit. The second The door opens up and they walk out of it, I instantly stride quickly, right infront of them, to the stall before the warm porcelain hug fades. after that i proceed to sit on the warm toilet seat and i just inhale the other person's scent and aura that's still lingering around.
anyways i was just wondering, do you guys think this is a weird thing to do, cuz i just feel like it's really a normal human interaction and people really to stop judging me for doing this ...

*jaw drops to floor, eyes pop out of sockets accompanied by trumpets, heart beats out of chest, awooga awooga sound effect, pulls chain on train whistle that has appeared next to head as steam blows out, slams fists on table, rattling any plates, bowls or silverware, whistles loudly, fireworks shoot from top of head, pants loudly as tongue hangs out of mouth, wipes comically large bead of sweat from forehead, clears throat, straightens tie, combs hair* Ahem, you look very lovely.

Added for Red Dead Redemption 2