I used to tickle my pickle to angry birds
When I was about 13 I LOVED angry birds, I had every game and bought every toy they had. One day I was playing angry birds when all of a sudden the big red bird turned me on. I couldn't stand it, I was going crazy. I decided to pull out my big snake and start stroking it. I never had felt so good, I soon continued to do this daily and never got bored of it! That big red bird was so hot and those blue ones were some cuties. I am glad to admit I still do this to this very day.

Hey, sorry I saw your profile and I just thought you looked cute in your picture :))) I really wanted to tell you what :)) It's really rare to see girls playing video games haha :))) I don't know why it's a guy thing honestly I'm like really against sexism and like i'll be the one in the kitchen making sandwiches :DD We should really play L4D2 sometime it's a really cool zombie game with a lot of scary moments, but don't worry i'll be there to protect you ;) sorry that wasnt flirting I swear i'm just trying to be friendly I really like your profile picture :))))) Sorry, was that too far? Really sorry i'm really shy I don't go out much haha! Add me on Skype we should talk you look really nice and fun :)))

I felt something visiting. This time two. They started sucking one nut each. Wasn’t a fan. I told them to go for the head. Felt a little uncomfortable. Kinda like it was probably gay? Had no way of telling so I said some Jesus stuff. They disappear by shrinking into shadows. I look over and Jesus is sitting on the dresser I don’t have. He’s small and had a blue nose. He’s just staring at me. Suddenly, I swing at him, not meaning to do harm. I don’t know why I did that. He did some ninja decoy s h i t and turned into 4 AAA batteries that fell over and rolled off the table. I looked over and he was watching me from another position. I explained why I don’t know why I did that and I felt at ease. I then woke up. Kinda proud of myself for avoiding head from a ghost or something this time. But I swung on Jesus, so idk.

Doesn't know how to jungle on league of legends and probably smells like soap. Makes me sick.