I've been noticing an unusual trend in the quality of Snickers bars over the last decade. I found an old one from 5 years ago and decided to study its composition under my spectrometer and discovered something unnerving. The Snickers bar currently sold in stores contains 43.67% less rare earth elements by weight, when compared to one sold 5 years ago. Do they think they can fool us? It's hard to wrap my mind around why they would do this. Thorium used to make up 12% of the bar, but now it's at 8%, and now there's only 4% Americium compared to 7% just a while ago. It's all been replaced by organic carbon-based matter, like sucrose and poorly crafted carbohydrates. I'm disappointed in the Mars corporation, and I hope my findings will gain enough publicity to force Mars into reverting back to the old formula. Consider this an open letter.

Ooga booga 🦍

❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤
Post this on the walls of the sluttiest girl you know.
❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤ ❤¸.•*""*•. ¸❤

Listen here, you little micro pen!s. If you say pizza rolls suck one more ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ time, I will give your parents stage 9 ass cancer.

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It's COOL to be gay!
Post this on the wall of a homosexual friend and tell them how COOL they are :)

hot