I sexually identify as a fidget spinner. Ever since I was only raw plastic, I dreamed of continually spinning around my axis until greasy, autistic fingers stopped me. Normal people bully me, and say things like "what the ♥♥♥♥, you aren't a fidget spinner", but I know deep down they are just jealous of my magnetism. I have already started attaching magnets to myself, and now i'm improving my spinniness by regularly rotating on an axis with my magnetism. I want you guys to respect my natural ability to instantly satisfy the fidgeting of retarded children, and if you don't you're oppressing me, retarded children, and fidget spinners like me around the world, and you should check your center of magnetism. Thank you for being so understanding.

Merry Christmas!!!