Turt Turs

As a noted Unionist, the Powers of the Protestant are strong in this one, routinely seen wandering in east Belfast brandishing an Ivory Coast flag and shouting '♥♥♥ da ra' from a fortress of pallets. Much like the Irish army in the South, the Unionists are a large group of unemployed men carrying rifles. It is advised by the Irish Government not to approach these creatures as, due to years of inbreeding, they are a wild and feral race prone to bouts of uncontrollable aggression in the face of facts and logic. It is advised to carry a bag of oranges when venturing into 'The Badlands' as it is the only known means of calming an out-of-control Protestant. Currently unexplained by science the Prod commands a strange affinity for all things orange. Side effects include rioting, marching and terrorism.