Cartman:
You guys wanna hear a funny joke my Grandpa told me?

Kyle:
No.

Cartman:
Okay. The- this family walks into a talent agency. It's a mother, father, their son and daughter, and a little baby. The father says to the talent agent, "Sir, our family has an amazing act. We know if you would let us perform it for you you would want to sign us." And the talent agent says, "Sorry, we don't sign family acts. They're too cutesy." But then the mother goes, "Please, sir, if you just give us two minutes, we know you'll like our act." So the talent agent says, "All right, you've got two minutes." The family jumps right into it. The mother smiles and points to the son, who hits "Play" on a boombox. Thrilling circus music starts to play as the father spins his daughter around, bends her over, lifts up her skirts and starts licking her butt.

Kyle:
What??

Cartman:
Then the son lays down on the floor and opens his mouth, and the mother tears off tear-away pants, squats down over his face and starts pooping all over him.

Kyle:
Dude!

Cartman:
Hold on! Hold on. The father grabs the baby, takes off his diaper and starts sucking his wiener, right? While the son, still with his mother's poop in his mouth, goes over and licks the baby's tiny little balls.

Kyle
Dude.

Cartman:
Hold on, Kyle. Now the mother lays down on her back on the floor while the daughter gets up high on a chair and starts peeing all over. Then the father and son take the baby and start stuffing it head-first back into the mother's goochie, while the daughter's pee rains down on all of them.

Kyle:
Dude, just stop. It-

Cartman:
They get the- towait. Hold on, Kyle. They get the baby halfway in so that just his legs are sticking out all kicking and flailing around, and the son takes the mother's poop out of his mouth and starts rubbing it all over everyone while the father sticks his wiener in the baby's butt and fricks it while it's still inside the mother, until he squirts all over the baby, the wife, the son and the daughter.

Kyle:
Car-Car-Cartman, I don't want any-

Cartman:
Kyle?! Will you hold on, please! Then the father gets up and says, "And now for our impersonation of the victims of 9/11." And the whole family starts running around screaming and laughing with their wieners and b00bz all flapping around, covered with pee and poop and squirt, goin' [falsetto] "AAAAAaaAAAAhhh! AAAAAaaAAAAhhh!, the building's comin' down! Heeelllppp!!!" [normal] And finally the family runs back to the center of the room and goes, "Ta-Da!!" And the talent agent, he just sits there for the longest time, and finally he says, "...Jesus, that's a heck of an act. What do you call it?" And the father says, "the Aristocrats!" [no response from the boys] Heheheh. [more silence]

Kyle:
I don't get it.

Cartman:
...Neither do I.