I am the almighty Nicolas Cage, WORSHIP ME!


Not clever? Mate, I am a natural born genius with an IQ so high that my testers couldn't even begin to fathom it. Whenever I show even a glimpse of my intelligence I shift things around me in directions no one (except me of course) even knew they could be shifted in. I am a master and commander. I am a gentleman and a scholar. I excel at everything without even trying and when I try I do things that no one on this planet is even capable of understanding in the slightest. It would take me less than a week to become the ruler of this world if I ever deemed it worthy to be ruled by me. I am the universe's greatest gift to humanity, my wisdom is infinite, my might is unmatchable, my skills surpass everything ever seen before. I am like a god to you.

(∩ ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)⊃━☆ﾟ. * ･ ｡ﾟ ＯＨ ＮＯ， ＹＯＵ＇ＶＥ ＢＥＥＮ ＢＡＭＢＯＯＺＬＥＤ ＢＹ ＴＨＥ ＭＡＧＩＣＡＬ ＬＥＮＮＹ
ＩＦ ＹＯＵ ＤＯＮ＇Ｔ ＧＩＶＥ ＩＭＭＯＲＴＡＬＳ ＩＩＩ ＢＹ ＭＩＤＮＩＧＨＴ， ＴＨＥ ＭＡＧＩＣＡＬ ＬＥＮＮＹ ＷＩＬＬ ＴＵＲＮ ＹＯＵ ＩＮＴＯ Ａ ＳＣＲＵＢ

AKA:
Black magician Professor Doktor Rodindoes Bartvik Barkvik Bakvis Kaas Fromage Untio Unitoe Niro Jihaj Jihad Geert Wilders Vasaliv Ian-Senpai Bastaard Van Brussel De Weeabo De Vries Kneepkens