LUTADOR MASOQUISTA
Brazil
 
 
Eu comi na infância, né? Comi, me deram leite materno, me deram leite ninho, me deram num sei o quê, cérebro tem o tamanho de um cérebro normal, neurônio tem neurônio a vontade então, então PORRA SE O CARA ESCREVEU VELHO, VOCÊ SÓ VAI ENTENDER O QUE ELE ESCREVEU, VOCÊ IMAGINA QUE ELE TEVE QUE TIRAR DO ZERO AQUELA MERDA TODA, É QUE NEM O TEOREMA DE PITÁGORAS, ELE DESCOBRIU O TEOREMA VOCÊ SÓ TEM QUE APLICAR NO TRIÂNGULO RETÂNGULO. A HIPOTENUSA É TANTO, O CATETO É TANTO, QUANTO É O OUTRO CATETO? Você só tem que pegar a hipotenusa, elevar ao quadrado, cateto ao quadrado, somar e diminuir, e chegar - e VOCÊ ERRA!! VÁ SER BURRO NA CADEIA VELHO! CARALHO. Porque o cara na Grécia 5 séculos antes de Cristo DESCOBRIU o que você...mil e qui... cinco mil anos depois NÃO CONSEGUE APLICAR! Porra você tem que comer alfafa, cara. Vai ser burro no inferno.
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Deep web hacking simulator + Kidnapper DLC


>Bought the game for a rather cheap price
>First try: Game crashes
>Second try: Game crashes
>Put everything on low
>Third try: Game crashes
>...
>14th try: Finally, Jesus...
>Game protagonist owns a PC which only has two things: "A.N.N Browser" and "Notes"
>Also, game protagonist has a friend named Adam
>Adam teaches you that hackers will attempt to (you guessed it) hack you
>"Not a problem, hackers hack, it's the deep web. Now where is the wicked stuff?"
>Adam says something about an urban legend of a kidnapper who kidnaps people who are in the Deep Web
>"Buuuuuuuullllllllshiiiiiiiiiittttt....."
>Adam explains to you how will you get the link to enter a Red Room
>Red Room is a type of website where people watch and participate in interactive torture and murder
>Game protagonist has a mental problem
>Adam says some websites are only available at some times of the night (e.g: a website may be on at 12 PM, may be off at 2 AM)
>A.N.N's homepage is the Deep Wiki, basically a list of sites where you would want to go. Possibly.
>Sees a site named "Cannabis World"
>Clicks the link
>Starts to get hacked
>It's a DOS minigame thing
>Easy peasy, let's try to open Cannabis Wor-
>Gets hacked again
>Tries to do that 5 times
>5 times got hacked
>♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥.png
>Let's try another
>DollMaker".com"
>Reads about 50 lines of how some creepy dude turns human girls into live sex toys
>whatamidoingwithmylife.wmv
>Tries to enter 174.6 different websites
>"Server unable to connect"
>youdontsay.jpg
>Enters ChosenAwake".com"
>Some weird stuff, the usual
>Accidentally clicks on a dot
>It lights up
>IT'S A PUZZLE, YISS
>Goes looking for the dots
>There are so many dots
>Big dots, small dots, dots that aren't dots
>They must all be pressed in the right sequence
>After 10 min of rage, did it
>I've got a link
>It leads to Deep Wiki II
>Oh look, more websites
>Websites which the server is unable to connect
>ihatemylife.gif
>About to enter Loogaroo".com"
>Hears a footstep
>"IT'S THE KIDNAPPER OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOH GAAAAAAAAAAWD"
>Turns lights off
>Don't make a sound on the mic (apparently the mic is linked to the game, so if you make a noise, game protagonist does too)
>30 seconds later I'm frozen
>"He's so gonna catch me now"
>2 min later
>"k he's probably gone now"
>probably
>Enters Loogaroo".com"
>Gets hacked countless times
>The kernel ones are so slow, the DOS ones are so fast
>Got hacked, lost my notes
>Including the one who told me the link to Deep Web II
>Gotta do everything again
>Hacked
>Hacked
>Unable to connect
>Hacked
>Unable to connect
>Footstep
>Turns lights off
>Turns lights on
>Hacked
>Repeat this 5 times
>Finally got somewhere
>Website called Gatekeeper.com (I won't put those quotation marks anymore, you got the point)
>The website is a damn quiz, of all the other websites informations
>Everytime you hit the wrong choice, hack time
>Now, time to go look on all the sites to get the info
>Unable to connect
>I just need to know when the sites are online
>But I will never know
>Because there are too many websites to look in too little time
>icryeverytime.mp3
>Time to do it the impatient way
>Hackers try to hack me over 15 times, they achieved 4
>But I got one part of the Red Room link
>One part...of eight
>I'd have to go through all of that ♥♥♥♥, 7 more times
>Rage quits

10/10 would get hacked again
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