Recent reviews by shiznizzle fuckbucket

I really don't know what I expected.
10/10

If you like the survival mode of Minecraft, the whole survive-and-explore spiel, Stranded Deep is right up your alley. If you also liked how unfinished and unpolished Minecraft felt in the early development stages... well, you'll probably love Stranded Deep even more. The game is essentially Castaway The Video Game. Stuck in the middle of the ocean on a little yellow raft armed with a water bottle, knife, and paddle, you must navigate through and survive perils like starvation, the elements, and the creatures of the deep. Crafting is a huge aspect of the game, albeit a limited one for the moment. And the only tutorial you get is making a flaming cocktail on the plane before it goes down... not too helpful for when you're staring at a bunch of palm trees wondering how to turn them into tools and shelters. Speaking of, the learning curve is that of Minecraft as well; virtually no clues or tutorials are included in the game. For that, you have to chase down the Stranded Deep Wikia and wing it.
Is there any ojbective to the game? Not necessarily. Just survive and explore for as long as you can without dying. Plus, the game might teach you a think or two, like Tiger Sharks are straight up ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ who will try to knock you out of your raft, or that if you're ever stranded on a deserted island, you'll probably wind up shouting at yucca plants to grow faster because I NEED SOME ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ LASHINGS TO FINISH BUILDING MY HUT, YOU ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ VEGITATION.
I give this game a tenuous recommendation. It has potential, but it's in early dev, and it shows. The scenery is gorgeous for how young this game is, but gathering coconuts and tending fires to cook crabs and fish gets to be as monotonous as you might imagine. The only real fun after a while is scavenging sea wrecks for loot and supplies. So while I'm not sure I can recommend purchasing this game at the moment, it's definitely one to keep your eyes on in the future.

Many of us, as the seasoned gamers that we are, have at some point or another stumbled across a game that breaks the fourth wall. An interesting experience, actually, since video-games are by and large about assuming the role of a character. So when one of these particular games comes along, it's refreshing play the story which reaches through the screen and asks /you/ to the be protagonist for a change.
The Stanley Parable, didn't just simply break the 4th wall, it carefully and deftly calculated the exact location of each and every individual atom that composes the metaphorical entity known as the 4th wall, and split every one of them in a nuclear-♥♥♥♥♥♥♥-4th-wall-obliterating mushroom cloud that is this game. Nothing is more meta than this game. Reality isn't even this meta.
The game plunges through themes of storytelling, player choices, non-linear narratives, and free will... everything that games are supposed to do in the background to enhance the user experience, The Stanley Parable does backwards in an almost Truman Show-esque display that's both amusing and thought-provoking. It would take a disturbingly long amount of time to properly unpack and analyze all the theory and philosophy thrumming smoothly through this game.
For a game that can throw this much thought provoking entertainment at a player in a digestible and fun format, it stands alone as it's own breed of unique and beautiful indie game. Definitely scoop this one up on the next sale.

I absolutely hate this game.

And I say that with some amount of awe. Gone home does a horrifyingly good job of exploiting every little fear you ever had while you were home alone, but were always too cool to admit to; as a matter of fact, it absolutely preys upon it. You hear your own footsteps, the doors creak open when you move through the rooms, and naturally, there's a thunderstorm raging outside. It's the type of game that reminds you why you bolted upstairs the second you turned off the lights (and maybe still do).
Coming home from studying abroad only to discover that your family has disappeared (rather cryptically) doesn't exactly lift the mood right off the bat. After which time, you stumble across a series of notes, most of which are bits and pieces of your younger sister's life as she made her way through her teens while you were at school. Most tell a story, build her character, and construct a narrative around a very lovable girl, only to have the occasional "Please don't tell mom and dad about the attic." thrown in for good ominous measure.

Have I finished the game? No. But it scares the ♥♥♥♥ out of me. Realistic horror is what I find really gets to me, and this game thrives on it. And yet the gameplay is a strange and jaunty ebb and flow of emotional backstory with dark, shadowy undertones. I find I can't play it for long, but I still keep coming back to play it more.

In short, I hate playing this game. It makes me anxious, antsy, and jumpy.

Buy it.

More like Cluster♥♥♥♥ ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ simulator, amirite? No, but seriously, this is good, stupid fun. It's like trying to masturbate on Ambien.