Recent reviews by Tovarisch Major

This game is a dating and rape simulator... You play as blonde an five guys pound u.

10/10 homeless guys fighting for one mosambique.

Rest in pieces! 10/10 SHAZBOT!

- AAAAAAAAAAAH! (kamikaze intensifies)
- BOOM!
- Aaaaaaaaah youself!

Played countless since year 2001.

1. In terms of design and graphics even after years this game looks better than most of indie garbage coming out nowadays.
2. You don't have hints or minimap like in modern games have. Because you simply can't get lost. Just go forward in place where enemies appear and kill 'em all.
3. Soundtrack is beautiful. Thanks to Damjan Mravunac and Undercode!
4. Sound effects are juicy.
5. Multiplayer. Cooperative abilities more impressive than in many modern games.
What is this fashion to make games that allow to play only 4-5 mates on server. Say nay to this ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥! 16 players may play on server in this game.

Nice continuation of the First Encounter.
And this game is ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ amazing! Isn't it?

Look at this colorful variety of alien foes.
Just take some double shotgun and shoot 'em all!

If only Steam could show how many hours I played this game since 2002...

1. Technical aspects.
Fusion adds several different bugs and issues that nobody fixes since the release (that was months ago).
And I have no words to describe how ugly BFE was ported into Fusion. Broken sliding kleer skeletons, broken lightmaps, broken balance... I'll better play original BFE.
Finally, an awful save/load system that is broken for months but nobody cares.

2. Where are HD textures?
In 2017... And even now in 2018 we still have some textures from CLASSIC games (TFE / TSE).
Seriously! CroTeam, you had years to redraw it. Maybe not in Serious Sam HD but still, why not in Fusion?

3. Models.
Some ingame models and their textures look EVEN WORSE than the same stuff in Classic TFE (2001) & TSE (2002).
Just look at ammo models like Electricity (Laser ammo) and Shells (Shotguns' ammo).
It is a critical issue when player constantly sees something that looks so ugly.

4. Levels... Damn it is a DEmake, not a remake.
I don't like that this game is positioned as a remake and something that's better than classics in all aspects.
Nobody even tried to improve geometry on levels except for terrains. We still have these low-poly rooms.
And also nobody tried to fix issues on levels from HD versions. Like that ugly looking Harpy secret on The Grand Cathedral level.
There is a hole in a wall that doesn't even match the wall's texture!
And it's only the beginning...

FIN
It is NOT a remake. It's more like an ugly port of old games onto an unfinished (in its current state) engine which is obviously a step backwards.
Why don't you finish the base first and then port every game available instead of trying to fix bugs that were there since the beginning?
If you wanna play TFE/TSE campaign, then play classic versions of games (2001 & 2002). Or at least HD versions.
And in case of BFE - play only original BFE if you don't want to have your chair burned out.

"Beta" is not an excuse for making games which are worse than their original versions.
Especially when you position it as a revolutionary base for content creation for all the Serious Sam games.

Farming simulator? Yes.
Trading simulator? Yes.
Bugs, bugs everywhere? Yes.
80% of weapons are useless? Yes.
Stupid AI? Yes.

10 of 10 nerfed guns!
10 of 10 updates which add more bugs than fixes.
10 of 10 enemies stuck in the wall.

Hello from 2019!
Yay! Like 1 month ago was anniversary - 2 years without updates.

Completelly broken, abandoned, deadborn game.
- Broken netcode (desyncs).
- Broken tickrate (increased from 20 to 40 with latest updates and doesn't give any benefits, only increased CPU usage).
- Broken performace (FPS is lower than in classic games with no any changes in graphics).

Don't play this s~~t!
It is better to play classics games!

Robbers'n'bandits... Zombie policemen survival simulator.

The epochal game where u get robbed by devs! Ideally!

P.S. Most of the game content sold as numerous DLCs.

Hats simulator? Nah!
If you want you can play and kill everybody with no care about these hats.

10/10 MEEEEEEDIC INTENSIFIES
10/10 Poot dispenser here!
10/10 Deaths from teleport.
10/10 Neon annihilator pyro-sharks on 2Fort.
10/10 Drunk demonmans.
10/10 Lost sandwiches.

Sadly this game doesn't get enough effort from Valve.