Dafuk? Like others have commented before, "...without the guide I would NEVER in a million years have thought of those words..." Even after reviewing some of highly useful guides, the achievements didn't unlock. Maybe it's just me, but after having a go at this game for around 20-30 minutes, I can't say I was massively compelled to keep going. IMHO just another run of the mill, free to play offering on Steam. Thanks, but no thanks.