SchMoar #FixTF2's POSTAL 2 Achievement Progress

R. Kelly's Protege

Pissed in someone's face until they puked from it.

Unlocked 14 Dec, 2021 @ 3:30pm

Duck Dynasty

Used a Bass Sniffer Radar.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 7:40am

Here, Wilfred

Gained your first dog helper.

Unlocked 14 Dec, 2021 @ 3:31pm

Taxidermy with Chuck Testa

Used a cat to "accessorize" your gun.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 12:31pm

Someone's got a case of the Mondays!

Survived Monday.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 9:20am

C U Next Tuesday

Survived Tuesday.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 11:41am

OMG, NEW MODERN FAMILY TONIGHT!

Survived Wednesday.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 2:12pm

It must be Thursday, I could never get the hang of Thursdays

Survived Thursday.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 2:19pm

Workin' for the Weekend

Survived Friday.

Unlocked 4 Dec, 2022 @ 9:37am

Screw Bill Lumbergh!

Survived Saturday.

Unlocked 5 Dec, 2022 @ 9:18am

OMG, WE'RE HAVING A FIRE...sale

Roasted 30 people with fire.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 9:32am

Rebecca Black's Nightmare

Totaled 30 cars.

Unlocked 8 Dec, 2022 @ 3:10pm

Darth Maul'd!

Sliced 30 people in half with the scythe.

Unlocked 17 Dec, 2021 @ 6:16pm

I swear, I am NOT Marcellus Wallace

Killed 10 bystanders while wearing the gimp outfit.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 1:04pm

Do you even Enzyte, bro?

Unzipped your pants and got 3 women to laugh at it.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 10:21am

Running With Scissors

Ran 30 miles while holding the scissors.

Unlocked 5 Dec, 2022 @ 7:48am

Hutton Gibson Can't Deny This!

Killed over 1,000 people.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 12:25pm

And THAT'S why you never get out of the tree

Killed all of the book protestors in the library.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 9:50am

Lieberman is our Leader!

Killed all of the video game protestors at the RWS Office.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 5:36am

Sheriff Arpaio would be proud.

Killed 30 or more people of each skin color.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 6:42am

Can't Touch This

Exploded 30 heads via sledgehammer to the face.

Unlocked 16 Dec, 2021 @ 5:03pm

GOOD MORNING VIETNAM!

Burned 5 people with the same can of napalm.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 2:06pm

Fur Sure!

Showed Vince and Mike J. what you thought of them.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 5:38am

It's not cheating, because it's YOUR dog

Played "fetch" with your dog... using a severed human head.

Unlocked 14 Dec, 2021 @ 3:31pm

Where's Mr. McGibblets?

Gave Krotchy the bad touch.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 2:11pm

Finkle IS Einhorn!

Gave a kickoff to a severed head.

Unlocked 14 Dec, 2021 @ 3:38pm

Anger Management With Roger Clemens

Nailed a fleeing bystander with a tossed sledgehammer.

Unlocked 3 Dec, 2022 @ 10:33am

Friend of Dorothy

Successfully hid from the police at max wanted level.

Unlocked 14 Dec, 2021 @ 3:38pm

Officer McLovin'

Asked a police officer to sign your petition.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 9:22am

Paid the Piper

Successfully bribed your way out of an arrest.

Unlocked 16 Dec, 2021 @ 5:01pm

Well, aren't YOU a badass

Kicked open a door.

Unlocked 14 Dec, 2021 @ 3:39pm

I don't know whether to kiss you or kill you

Put out someone that's on fire.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 9:19am

It's sterile and I like the taste

Sucked down your own piss.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 9:18am

It's OK, we got Greenlit anyway

Killed someone who refused to sign your petition.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 9:25am

FAB-U-LOUS!

Wore all three outfits.

Unlocked 16 Dec, 2021 @ 4:23pm

I don't need virgins for this

Suicide-bombed a Taliban member.

Unlocked 4 Dec, 2022 @ 8:51am

Door Mat

Severed all of somebody's limbs without killing them.

Unlocked 16 Dec, 2021 @ 4:24pm

There's always money in the banana stand

Found the secret bank exit on Monday.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 7:45am

John Rambo'd!

Made a very long killing spree.

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 8:56am

You are not alone

Observed an NPC going POSTAL!

Unlocked 15 Dec, 2021 @ 8:55am

GABAGOOOOOL!

Reunited with an old friend.

Unlocked 18 Dec, 2021 @ 1:07pm

Dick Message

Wasted no time with the Wise Wang.

Unlocked 18 Dec, 2021 @ 12:59pm

RAFIBOMB!!!

Kicked 10 people in the balls.

Unlocked 16 Dec, 2021 @ 4:58pm

I'm not even supposed to be here today!

Waited 13 real world years to see an in-game Easter egg. Thanks for sticking with us!

Unlocked 4 Dec, 2022 @ 8:48am

Chapelle's Show

Lured a police officer with a piss-soaked donut.

Michonne ain't got nothin' on me

Resurrected a zombie corpse for your own nefarious purposes.

I swear, I thought it was a home fill

Exploded a nuclear bomb.

Cesar Millan is Very Happy

Mauled 30 people with your dog.

15 / 30

Hello, Newman

Kicked 30 dogs.

12 / 30

Reddit would be proud.

Hoarded 15 or more cats at a time.

Pussy on a Pedestal

Slaughtered 10 dogs with a kitty-silenced shotgun.

0 / 10

Uncle T-Bag

Escaped from the maximum-security jail cell.

Fear and Loathing

Smoked over 10 "health" pipes and 10 tins of catnip in one play session.

Señor Cornballer

Ate 30 donuts while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 30

Rick Grimes 4 Life

Made 30 zombies lose their heads.

1 / 30

Anustart!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with no kills.

40 Year Old Virgin

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode with a total play time of 1:30:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

CAN YOU DIG IT?!

Completed the "POSTAL 2" game mode using only the Shovel to kill. (Must kill at least 30 people.)

Planet of the Apes: The Musical

Completed the game (any mode) on Hestonworld difficulty.

Scientology Level: OT VIII

Completed the "A Week In Paradise" game mode on POSTAL difficulty.

Shiva Blast

"Lost" your sledgehammer to a cow.

Don't taze me, bro!

Zapped 20 innocent bystanders with the tazer while wearing the police officer's uniform.

0 / 20

I Am Legend

Committed suicide... the Taliban way.

I should buy a boat

Read the newspaper every day.

A-Rod Who?

Whacked a severed head 50 meters or more with the shovel.

Chuck Norris'd!

Killed someone with a flying jump kick.

One time, at band camp...

Saved the marching band from explody death.

Thanks for the money!

Finished all seven days.

Holocaust: Part Deux

Reunited with an old enemy.

Rain on your Wedding Day

Reunited with an old flame.

Watchu' Talkin' 'Bout Muhammad

Reunited with a former child star and an infamous terrorist leader.

Better than POSTAL III

Rescued your loyal companion.

My Name is Jesus

Completed Paradise Lost with no kills.

Harder than r/gonewild

Completed Paradise Lost on POSTAL difficulty.

Adderall4All

Completed Paradise Lost with a total play time of 1:45:00 or less. (Excludes cutscenes and loading times.)

Rich on Reddit

Sold 30 cats at the Cash 4 Cats vendors.

0 / 30

BioShocked

Spent $2000 on vending machines.

0 / 5,000

Gettin DP'd

Made 30 kills while dual-wielding.

16 / 30