So I once was at the store, right, just bying some snacks for the night, when i saw him. This really huge man, he must've been at least 5'8. He was wearing a hoodie, probably hiding his chicken hair. I was kinda thrown off balance by his presence, there was something really odd about him. I got the usual, cheetos and coffee for the morning. Except that time i also bought chicken breast, as we were gonna have pasta for dinner tommorow with Robin. As i was walking home, I still had that unnerving feeling. And then i saw it. A shadow. Right before my front door. That guy, thing just stood there, not doing anything. I was so scared, and paranoid that i just screamed. I shouted "Who are you, what do you want?!" And with the creepiest voice possible, he said: "Some people say i'm tiny, well guys, i'm not tiny, i'm compact. So when i have a shower, i get out of the shower and look at this full-body mirror that i have, and i just start ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ flexing and like squeezing my like buttcheeks together and i go damn that guy's compact!". I was sickened by what i'd just heard. I told him to get the ♥♥♥♥ out of my property. he satrted walking, but instead, he was walking straight to me, he pulled out a baseball bat and shouted "BONK" as he struck me in the head with it. I immediatly woke up in my bed, and sighed out of relief. Looked at the clock, it was 2 am. I got up to check the kitchen. Everything that i bought was there. So i went to bed, as i assured myself it was a dream. And as i was lying there, trying to fall asleep, i heard it. That quiet, gentle whisper, coming from under my bed. Coffee...Cheetos...chicken