before i start, i just need to say some things

-i am not trolling
-i very rarely rage in chat AT ALL
-and i almost always act mature and cool headed in games

Okay, so, i tend to go on community servers, and one thing i particularly remember is a jailbreak server, i joined and managed to get to be warden, i was so exited to do it that i even got my gaming headphones which have an actual microphone. i went into voice chat and tried to talk, and then...


immediately, half of everyone on the server began to yell at me and call me a squeaker, while other people told me i suck, when it was my first time even being a warden on a jailbreak server. but i went on, that round didn't go well, so i got warden again, only to be met with the same things. eventually i got overwhelmed and left, trying not to sob on voice chat.


i don't know how to structure this so now here's a bit of information about me:

i am 16 but
my voice just REFUSES to drop, leading to people not believing me when i try to tell them

i rarely start raging, i did used to get mad and yell, but since then I've learned to control my emotions, although sometimes i do end up getting salty.

i am pretty emotional, usually, until people start insulting me, i'm fine, i just play the game. the ONLY time i start to get upset is when people bully me and call me names, when this happens it usually ends badly.


okay, so now to continue.

i HATE the term squeaker, its insulting, and because i'm very sensitive about the fact that i neither look nor sound my age, i get mad, i cry, i yell in chat, BUT what should be noted is that this ONLY HAPPENS WHEN I'M PROVOKED!! i think that the way kids are treated online is incredibly unfair. and calling someone a "squeaker" is bullying, and the worst part of it is that when i stand up for myself... people just laugh and tell me to "stop being mad" or to "get good" when it has nothing to do with skill whatsoever, normally i don't let this kind of stuff bother me, but after a while, it gets in my head... why can't kids just play games? it's not my ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ fault my voice is high pitched, its not my fault i actually ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ stick up for myself. I'M ALOUD TO USE VOICE CHAT TOO! SO STOP ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ HARASSING ME FOR DOING IT!!

i have been told to kill myself more times than i can count, but this assaults me on a personal level, please just ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ mind your own business... if my voice is annoying just mute me.