Recent reviews by noisyturtle

Easily the most frustrating and unrewarding game I have ever played in my life.
If the idea of losing hours of progress over a literal coin flip appeals to you, then torture yourself with this trash.

FromSoft put in a red NPC Invader that did the Point Down emote at me.
Very triggering.

Good dive.

You'd have to be pretty lame to base your review of this amazing game on one feature you'll probably never use.
This is one of the grandest, and most ambitious Yakuza games to date, which is saying a lot. I'm having a blast so far!

I'm a cheap bastard, and I paid $77 for the Digital Deluxe edition of this game.

100% worth it

Game Of The Year 2023, easily.

Actual trash and garbage. This "game" is 100% trash garbage and to play it is nothing but a waste of your time and energy. ♥♥♥♥ this ♥♥♥♥.

Fun for one playthrough. Not enough post-game content, and the biggest flaw is the total lack of skill branching. You just progress until you've unlocked everything, so every game winds up being the same in the end.
Zero replayability, but you'll get about 15-20hrs from the base game, which is charming and a good balance between town building and a roguelite.
Get it on sale.

Character redesigns are ugly, and blocking feels way off.
Story and Tower modes are fun.
Get it on sale.

I've zero rhythm, so without the visual ques this is impossible for me to play. Subject matter is very shallow and materialistic. Not for me.

Do you love playing Vampire Survivors, but also wish you could be looking at big 'ol anime tiddies at the same time?
This fulfills your very specific requirements.