Science cannot tell us everything. But it does separate humankind from beasts and music enthusiasts.










Only a bastard would try and play a mechanical breath banjo without practicing first, and as such, I’ve taken the liberty of creating you a trainee version with stabilizers. Regard! The Quad-monica. Three things you need to play this, my friend. First, hand on either side. Second, lips, checkity-check. Thirdly, the most important of all, air. But the right kind of air from the right place of your body. And that's what I’m gonna teach ya to harness here tonight. So, maneuver the Quad about half an inch from the luscious, skeletal lips of yours. Now, lift up your elbows and get it nice and secure, and that's important my friend because I’m gonna reach under here, lift up your shirt and blow raspberries on your belly. And there are scientific aspects involved in this, that if I manage to hit the right pocket of air it’ll travel up your body out your mouth and it will power the Quad-monica, alright? And when it does, you lot better give him a round of applause cause let me tell ya something, this isn't an easy task for anybody, alright? I’ll also say there's not as much vegetation here as the heat emanating from the south would have suggested. I gotta tell ya, boy, I’m gonna play ya like a bagpipe.