After shouting at small children to get off my lawn, attending neighbourhood watch meetings where I voice the collective concerns of the c-c-c-c-community, picking the scabs off my knees, whinging about local government and slapping myself repeatedly in the face with my 3rd leg, I do rather enjoy a game of Counter-Strike. Naturally, we have a neighboorhood watch league going and I must say, and I'm not one for bragging, but I FU**ING KICK THOSE WRINKLY OLD PENSIONERS ARSES AT IT!!! I B-B-B-B-BRING THE PAIN!!!!!!! BOW DOWN TO YOUR MASTER!!!!!!!

Ahem. Carry on.