Me to Astarion:
No lube, no protection, all night, all day, from the kitchen floor to the toilet seat, from the dining table to the bedroom, from the bathroom sink to the shower, from the front porch to the balcony, vertically, horizontally, quadratic, exponential, logarithmic, while I gasp for air, scream and see the light, missionary, cowgirl, reverse cowgirl, doggy style, backwards, sideways, upside down, on the floor, in the bed, on the couch, levitating poltergeist-style, on a chair, being carried against the wall, outside, in a shaking, throbbing, fist clenching, ear ringing, mouth drooling, ass clenching, nose sniffing, eyewatering, eye rolling, hip thrusting, earthquaking, sheet gripping, knuckle cracking, jaw-dropping, hair-pulling, teeth clenching, vile, sloppy, moan inducing, heart-wrenching, spine tingling, backbreaking, leg cramping, atrocious, gushy, creamy, beastly, lip biting, gravity defying, nail biting, sweaty, feet kicking, mind blowing, body shivering, orgasmic, bone-breaking, world ending, black hole creating, universe-destroying, devious, mischievous, scrumptious, amazing, delightful, delectable, unbelievable, body numbing, bark-worthy, left limping, unable to sit, nodding-off, soul-evaporating, volcano erupting, sweat rolling, voice cracking, irreparable trembling, sheet soaking, hair drenching, flabbergasting, lip locking, skin peeling, bite marked, eye-widening, nail scratching, hickey’d up, back scratched raw, spectacularly finished off, brain cell dissolving, molecule splitting, hair ripping, show stopping, magnificent, bruised up, extraordinary, splendid, phenomenal, mouth foaming, heavenly awakening, third eye unlocking, fifth-dimensional breaking, fourth wall breaking, bark bark bark arf arf WOOF WOOF WOOF