Smurf
Smurf 2

BEHOLD nescient mortals, a supernal being of yore has decended! Ye be glad for this puissant yet generous god shall SMITE the perfilious evil with his rhadamanthine power and REND thier very being assunder, cleansing this noisome and toxic world with its FILTH and CURRUPTION.

Ye who are evil, ye who are malific, have FEAR! for your time has come to end!
Ye who are good, ye who are wise, OBEY and praise for that is thy will.

LISTEN! Hear me and obey! for my name is COOKIE! THE PRIMODIAL GOD OF YORE! THE DEMON LORD OF CHAOS! AND DEVOURER OF ALL MIDNIGHT SNACKS! I have come to imbrue myself on this vile and wretched lands.

DROWN the land in BLOOD RED ICHOR! INCARDINE the sky with FEIRY BLOOD! STAIN the sea with CRIMSON BLOOD!

LET THE WAR BEGIN!!!