Recent reviews by Shart Demon

Woke slop

It's literally just fallout with swords

For those who've always had a slavery kink this is the ultimate gooning experience

Rim Job

I Kingdom Came

first character:
1 intelligence 10 agility 10 strength > grunt at everyone at shady sands > book it straight west to mariposa military base > get captured by intelligent super mutants > sell out my entire vault > world record speedrun finish bad ending

second character:
10 agility 9 perception 10 luck > run straight south towards the hub > stumble across nuka cola shipment random encounter > find over 80k caps in the truck > arrive at the hub > gamble the 80k caps > win every single time > become the richest person in the history of fallout > buy energy weapons from the gunners early game > murder everyone in the brotherhood of steel > take their armor and weapons > single handedly destroy the mutant army > bad ending

third character:
10 intelligence 8 charisma 10 agility > literally never use any weapons and talk my way through the entire game > tell the master his plan his flawed and stupid > convince him to kill himself > took long time but good ending hooray

its like if pulp fiction was a clunky isometric 90s pc game with a nerdier theme

One of the games ever

Fun for the whole family

No due process for millennial game designers

I was going to make the joke about the 50,000 people used to live here, and that its a ghost town now, but the game is actually still well populated. I can't tell you how much of my life I wasted on this game on the Xbox 360.

10/10 best Call of Duty ever.