Recent reviews by Dr. Aki Makura

Typical whacky physics game, but you move way too slow. Character is janky and its not fun.

NONE OF THAT 60 PLAYER ONLY BULLS-

WE GOT 15 PLAYERS

The game controls terribly and runs like ass. You walk at about 5 inches per hour, and to speed up walking you can spam clicking, but only increases your walk speed by like, an inch. The pathing in this game sucks, and when you interact with objects, your character will walk around the whole screen just to move "closer" to the object, which was right next to him the whole time. There's partial voice """acting""", and its absolutely terrible. The lines are corny and dumb, and have spelling errors. This game is half assed garbage, and shouldn't be on steam. This game isn't even so bad its good, it just sucks

Game sucks, it is LITERALLY Battleborn, except that you can actually look at without wanting to kill yourself. Go play Paladins instead.

Edit: Forgot to mention, it installs Arc, which is some kind of stupid tertiary launcher you need for this game. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ stupid. ♥♥♥♥ games on steam that make me download, another ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ steam just to play their game.

1/10 It's like diarrhea had a baby.

It's hard to look at.
There's no coherence in the stylizations of the characters.
Everyone is "Badass".
Uninteresting Story.
Game runs like ♥♥♥♥.
Voice acting is like nails on a chalkboard for the most part.
Game is not fun.

It might be free to play right now, but it's definetly not cheap enough. Don't even think about buying the full game upgrade for 30; I've already seen copies of Battleborn at Five and Below en masse.

Randy, you suck

You losers call it a trial only because you can't admit your game was ♥♥♥♥. It's not a free trial its now free to play.

Cute fun game. Pretty suprised with how much fun I had with it for the short time it was played.
Sheep is the best character, and you can ♥♥♥♥ off if you think otherwise

It's like DS2 reared its ugly head all over again. Everything is a cheap out. The map is saturated with enemies, the enemies are super spammy, and those archers and angels are the dumbest, waste of time I've ever seen.

The DLC is straight up, ripped out of the base game. You can just FEEL it. Go look at the trailers for the base game. This DLC was clearly part of the base game; repackaged and resold for more cash.

First boss you get to is a double boss! Then he turns into megazoid Demon Prince, which is total joke, and easy as balls to kill. The double boss section is harder; solely because you got three enemies to fight; the two ♥♥♥♥ demons and your ♥♥♥♥ camera.

After I passed the stupid area (any area in the DLC), I lost any interest I had in continuing my game and uninstalled.

I ended up finishing the DLC. It is just a tad longer than the Ashes DLC, but still very short. Midir is a pointless boss, and only serves as an exercise in patience. Terrible.

The PVP boss is a good idea with TERRIBLE execution. The summoned player should get bonus HP, and be larger or something. (Like Ornstien size.) Remove the Useless painting guardian NPCs.

After beating baby's first twink, and the painting gaurdian twins; (Which you can completely ignore) you get 80,000 souls. This is WAY too much for such an easy boss. Compare to Gael which only gives you 120,000. Wow!


Slave Knight Gael is the BEST thing about this DLC, but he felt a bit too easy to defeat, and leaves a lot to be desired. I think he should punish healing more often, as I was able to heal no problem at any time. He probably would feel alot better on NG+, or NG++; but I've no interest in playing through the whole game again.


The rest of the areas; while they look cool, are not fun to explore.

4.5/10; only slightly better than Ashes of Ariandel

A whole lot better than 2, but not as memorable or good as 1. The game's world feels so, bland...
A lot of the time I felt myself dreading getting a certain item just because I had to trudge though X area. This never happened to me in DS1. The hubworld is ♥♥♥♥, and I can't believe they kept leveling up with the firekeeper a thing. Thanks for making me have to sit through two loading screens just so I can end up right back where I was. Cool.

The bosses are non memorable; half of the bosses being a literal joke. PVP, is ok, but parrying feels very DS2, which is ♥♥♥♥.

Final boss is a letdown, and is just "le nostalgia fighty gywn man fanservice" for fans of the first game. I'm a fan of the first game, but they really should have done something different and more grand.

Once again, the game's lore and characters are complete ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥. There is no way in HELL ANYONE would be able to get certain items in the game, or access certain areas without a walkthrough or searching it up online. (You know what area I'm talking about.) The world and the characters should drop slight hints, give you SOMETHING. They don't say ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ in this game, they just repeat the same dreary ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, and then; oh, you can't get that item anymore sorry.

I wanted to get all achievements for this game, but there is no way in hell I am suffering though the boring trudge of going through NG to NG+3; something which once again, I had no problem doing in DS1.

I really wanted to like this game, I really did. But playing through it again for the sake of the DLC really opened my eyes.

5/10

Get it if its on sale

Terrible, very short DLC. There's only two bosses, and they are both complete ♥♥♥♥.

Two bosses at once! Fun right? You get to do that two times!

Fight Sif, and his retarded handler! (With bonus completely useless three wolves in the beginning.)

Lady Friede? You get to kill her three times! Wow!

The areas in the DLC aren't that interesting, most of it you just run past. Then there's an entire section with slow moving bird embryos. Pointless.

The Nordic Axe / Bow men are out of place. There weren't even nordic structures or a boss (Which would have been nice) to tie them into the world. They are literally just there.

The only cool thing about the DLC was those Bird Knights with the Claw, and Rapier. Everything else sucked.

3/10

I went bowling