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29 of 29 (100%) achievements earned:
Personal Achievements
 

ACHIEVEMENT WHORE

Unlock all achievements
Unlocked 9 May, 2016 @ 1:09pm

1-800-CLEARED

Finish the game
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2016 @ 3:24pm

1-800-GETHELP

Finish the game on hard mode
Unlocked 24 Mar, 2016 @ 3:36pm

1-800-GODDAMN

Get A+ on all levels on normal
Unlocked 11 Apr, 2016 @ 5:25pm

NUCLEAR WASTE

They won't reach the Nuclear Throne
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2016 @ 3:34pm

FANTASTIC!

Unlock all the Fans
Unlocked 16 Mar, 2016 @ 6:10pm

THESE ARE MY RIFLES, THESE ARE MY GUNS...

Unlock all weapons for the Soldier
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2016 @ 1:05pm

SNAKE CHARMER

Unlock all snake masks
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2016 @ 1:05pm

WHAT YOU LEAVE FOR YOUR SONS

Unlock all of the Son's techniques
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2016 @ 3:24pm

FANATIC

Clear a level with each Fan
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2016 @ 3:24pm

FAMILY BUSINESS

Clear a level with each of the Son's techniques
Unlocked 19 Mar, 2016 @ 4:16am

SNAKES ON A HEAD

Clear a level with each snake mask
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2016 @ 3:24pm

DON'T LET ANGER GET THE BEST OF YOU

Clear all of the Writer's levels without killing
Unlocked 19 Mar, 2016 @ 4:16am

EXTRA! EXTRA! READ ALL ABOUT IT!

Get the big picture
Unlocked 19 Mar, 2016 @ 4:16am

A BOX FULL OF SHARP OBJECTS

Use every weapon in the game at least once
Unlocked 22 Mar, 2016 @ 1:44pm

PERCUSSIVE MAINTENANCE

Destroy 100 electronic devices
Unlocked 19 Mar, 2016 @ 4:16am

KARMA

Die 1000 times
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2016 @ 1:05pm

GENOCIDE

Kill 50,000 enemies
Unlocked 9 May, 2016 @ 1:09pm

GOT YOUR BACK

Shoot two enemies during a chainsaw finish
Unlocked 20 Mar, 2016 @ 3:24pm

FOLLOW THE SCRIPT

Do as the Director says!
Unlocked 19 Mar, 2016 @ 4:16am

ASSASSIN'S CRED

Clear the 1st floor of NO MERCY with the silencer
Unlocked 19 Mar, 2016 @ 4:16am

DEAD SILENT

Finish SUBWAY without the Gang Leader seeing you
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2016 @ 1:05pm

I'M COMING IN AND I'M UNARMED!

Finish HOMICIDE without using guns
Unlocked 17 Mar, 2016 @ 1:05pm

STARE INTO THE ABYSS

Unlock THE ABYSS
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2016 @ 6:41pm

THE BAR OF BROKEN HEROES

Meet up with the Biker
Unlocked 18 Mar, 2016 @ 3:50pm

COMBO BEGINNER

Perform a 5x combo
Unlocked 16 Mar, 2016 @ 1:37pm

COMBO INTERMEDIATE

Perform a 10x combo
Unlocked 16 Mar, 2016 @ 6:53pm

COMBO MASTER

Perform a 15x combo
Unlocked 16 Mar, 2016 @ 6:53pm

COMBO GOD

Perform a 20x combo
Unlocked 24 Mar, 2016 @ 4:47pm