Enter WASTEMAN 1 and WASTEMAN 2

WASTEMAN 1 Oi, why you disrespecting me bruv?

WASTEMAN 2 My mistake, original gangster!

WASTEMAN 1 No, this cannot be forgiven. Now empty
the compartments of your pantaloons!

WASTEMAN 2 For what purpose?

WASTEMAN 1 And discard of your fervour as well.

WASTEMAN 2 For what purpose?

WASTEMAN 1 In fact, I am equipped to summon the one
casualty known as Little Travis on your
buffoon self.

Exuent WASTEMAN 1.

Basically if you are a pedo who r*pes kids, a murderer who kills good guys, or a bad guy who does all the bad stuff, then I say this to you: middle finger.

I just need to release this into the void. My boss has the most perfect bald head I’ve ever seen. Like not just bald… divinely bald. Smooth. Shiny. Shaped like it was sculpted by horny angels. Some days I wanna slap it. Other days I wanna lick it. Hormones decide.

Anyway. Last Thursday, during peak ovulation, I was sitting behind him and his bald head was RIGHT there. So I did what any mentally unstable woman would do: I reached out and touched it. Just a soft, slightly lingering touch. Like a blessing. Like I was grounding myself to the earth via l contact.

He turned around and I panicked and was like oh haha you had lint. He just nodded and said thanks. That was it.

But I went home and thought about that bald head ALL weekend. Like… feral levels of overthinking. I don’t even like him like that. But that DOME ??Totally owns me.

Anyway I haven’t touched it again but the urge is strong and I am weak.

• buble

⠃⣶⠬⠭⣉⡛⠿⣿⠿⠿⠿⠿⠿⢿⣿⠿⢛⣉⣭⠥⣶⠘
⢸⡇⣿⣷⡶⣉⣥⣶⣶⣾⣿⣿⣷⣶⣶⣬⣉⢴⣶⣶⢹⡆
⡄⣧⠛⣡⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣜⠿⣸⢠
⣷⠘⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠃⣾
⣿⢰⣿⣿⣿⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡆⣿
⣿⠸⣿⣯⡙⠄⠁⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⢋⣩⣉⢻⣿⣿⡇⣿
⣿⣆⠻⣿⣥⣀⣠⣿⣿⣟⢅⡸⣻⣿⣾⣿⣿⣤⣿⡟⣰⣿
⣿⣿⣷⣌⡛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣬⣥⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⣩⣴⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⢷⡶⢨⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⣭⡅⢰⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⠰⣧⡁⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⠌⠳⡟⣿⡟⣿⣿⢻⣿⢻⣇⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣤⣡⣅⣙⠃⠿⠿⠌⠋⣈⣬⣥⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
ㅤㅤ+REP I wish you best luck