Your Request for Patanjali Condom stock of Ultra Thin Dotted 200 Condoms has been rejected. As per complete body CT scan reports by Indian Medical Association you don't have a working male excretory urinal organ (penis).

We are extremely sorry for the inconvenience.

Regards,
PMO India, New Delhi, Randipur
110069.

I consider sucking ♥♥♥♥ an art form. When someone tells me to suck his ♥♥♥♥ I view it as an honor and a privilege. Not to mention an opportunity to show off my unparalleled ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ skills. Most of the time, the man puts up quite the struggle and yells at me that he *didn't mean it literally*. But I see straight through that ruse. When I finally free that ♥♥♥♥ from his pants and place it inside my mouth everything changes. The look of blissful ecstasy on his face reaffirms what I already hold true in my heart. This is what I was born to do. ♥♥♥♥ is my medium and I am its master. No ♥♥♥♥.

Schödinger's blowjob - Imagine you're blindfolded and you're getting the best raw pornstar-grade blowjob in the entire universe. The catch is, however, that you'll never figure out who's giving you that god-tier awesome schmösome sloppy toppy unless you take the blindfold off. It could be anybody, Ariana Grande, Ben Shapiro, Harold from the 7-11 near my house, or even your uncle's neighbour's fireman's cat. Now the question is: would you take off the blindfold and find out who the person/thing behind the stupendous jimmy-nibbler is and risk permanently scarring yourself, or would you keep the blindfold on and continue having your knob slobbed till your spirit hits the sky?

Not going to be active on Reddit tonight. I’m meeting a girl (a real one) in half an hour (wouldn’t expect a lot of you to understand anyway) so please don’t DM me asking where I am (I’m with the girl) you’ll most likely get aired because I’ll be with the girl (again I don’t expect you to understand) She’s actually really interested in me and it’s not a situation I can pass up for some meaningless Carti degenerates (Because I’ll be meeting a girl, not that you are really going to understand) this is my life now. Meeting women and not wasting my precious time online, I have to move on from such simple things and branch out. (You wouldn’t understand)

I really hate this double standard, when a girl buys a dildo, its seen as a bit of naughty fun. BUT when a guy orders a 240 Volt FckMaster Pro 5000 blowup latex doll with 6 speed pulsating vagina, elasticized anus with non-drip semen collection tray, hes called a pervert?

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U HAVE BEEN FEDORA TIPPED BY THE EUPHORIC SKILENTON. SEND THIS TO 7 PPL OR SKELINTONS WILL DOWNVOTE YOU