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Everytime I do this I ask myself. Why? Why? I can’t find any response. I feel disgusted by myself every time. But still I can’t stop. I want to be loved by someone, not hated by myself.
Honestly I just go through all of these videos hoping that at least one of them will look like her but in the end I’m just disappointed and disgusted in my self. Why won’t she like me back?
Anyone else just sick of this and just want someone to love and hold on your bed. Just me?
This can't be it. this can't be all to life. i don't enjoy this anymore. i only jerk off for the dopamine. porn, sex, not of it makes me happy. i miss how things used to be. i miss being happy. i'm in a constant search for pleasure and validation and i can't find it. the days where i used to wake up happy and ready for a new wonderful day are gone. i hate this world. i hate this life.
Nothing brings me joy anymore i’m tired of living like this