Recent reviews by BlaggyDeKatze

I don't feel like I can give this game a positive review anymore.

The developers clearly have no idea how to balance their game. They constantly have to revert nerfs and buffs because they don't weigh the pros and cons of a nerf/buff before they release it.

Melee weapons have always been wacky, especially the sword when mixed with a dash ability. Light players are able to abuse their class to rubberband in circles around you and kill you with 2 pokes. This has been a known issue, and yet a few updates ago they BUFFED the sword?! I've seen sword-dash players win multiple 1v3s, it's just not enjoyable. I have beef with some other stuff but none of it kills the mood as much as a cracked out light player with sword.

TLDR; Light players are desecrating the joy of this game and the developers are supporting it whole-heartedly because a few of the devs "Love playing light class".

Parkinson's Aim Punch Simulator 2023

Okay gameplay, Wacky AI.

Great lore, good scares.

The gaming industry is now releasing Early Access Ports.

PROS:
-Graphics are beautiful (most of the time), the beginning of the game is like a showcase, and then the devs went "meh" later on. Or maybe I just hate the repetitive and somewhat lazy level design. I get stuck on a lot of objects in this game. I'll also never understand why games show off a landscape that can't even fully render at max settings, like.. What are you showing off? All of the clipping trees? The low quality fog? The giant statues I can see texture seams on? What is it? Use those beautiful reflections to show me a man's face being pulverized by a robot.

-Game runs like butter for how amazing it looks

-Lots of upgrading, but you have to find upgrade schematics. F*** me, I hate fetch quests.

-Insanely cool environment

-Combat is actually pretty fun and challenging, but sometimes it's only challenging because it's glitchy.

-Why is an upgrade station talking THAT dirty? Couldn't tell you, but I'll accept it. Bigshot character doesn't seem to enjoy having a girl tell him that she wants him to squirt his liquid inside of her. I mean c'mon, the way this chick is talking would be enough to turn Lil Nas straight ffs! Grow a ♥♥♥♥, me. Gah I hate playing this character.


CONS:
-Locked FOV

-Forced to play as a hero who acts like a bigshot, has a ♥♥♥♥♥♥ attitude, and even ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ jokes. I'm talkin' maximum cringe. His glove lets him do some badass stuff, yet he still bullies the hell out of it for no reason? The best bullying he could come up with is to say the glove's name slightly wrong everytime. If my hand could turn into a pocket♥♥♥♥♥, I think I'd be able to pronounce "Ana de Armas" correctly at least a few times. Have some respect, "war hero".

-Confusing action sequences (Maybe due to not being able to see anything at a 55 degree FOV?) but it's really bad. I'm just lost everytime action starts, like.. isn't my adrenaline supposed to be pumping? It almost never is, and when it is, it last 3 seconds. Usually because bigshot war hero says something stupid. Was the writer watching family guy while he worked?

-Badass music, but it's used wrong and doesn't contribute to gameplay or jumpscares.

-Story could be great.. if it was written by anybody else.

-Game could be scary, but there's so much cringe going on, I was just wincing the entire time. A robot's face opens up for a jump scare, but it's just.. not scary. Idk yo. I'm surprised the main character didn't start tickling the robot, because it seems like something the writers would add. The game feels like it has the same horror level as that one scene from IT where IT just starts dancing. Just because he's doing something weird and off doesn't make it scary.

-The intro is kind of long, yet the first climax is so rushed? Everything goes to ♥♥♥♥ in like 5 seconds, but in a boring way. In a COD way.. if that makes sense to you. Basically, instead of you going "Holy ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥", you go "oop, okay, that just happe- oop, there she goes!"

-The voice acting makes me want to blow my brains out.

-Andrew Tate's Grandma won't give you a weapon despite you being a war hero.. okay. You go grandma, but f*** you. I wanna go ham too, but nooooo, russian babushka knows how to use a rocket launcher and makes me feel like a little ♥♥♥♥♥. I'll drop your ass next time I see you crossing the road, Grandma.

-Puzzles are confusing, which makes for great puzzles, except that I accidentally solved a few puzzles (in a row) without knowing how, sooo... Does the game know I have a 28 IQ, so it just lets me randomly click the pretty lights and win everytime? Or am I just getting lucky? Or are they not actually puzzles? Idk.

-Looting is fun for the first 10 minutes, then it becomes a hassle. You'd think sucking loot into your pocket♥♥♥♥♥ is better than searching each individual drawer, but is it really? Most games already allow you to search entire desks without having to search each drawer. I guess the best part is, you don't have to sit through an animation.. Unless you pick up a f**king audio "pocket watch" and get forced into an animation to stare at it, over, and over, and over. Do majority of players even listen to audio clips?

-When crouched, the corners of your screen get dark, which is okay, but for some reason the shadows in the game get WAYYY more intense at the corners and sides of my screen? Wtf? Why should I get tunnel vision just because I'm crouched? Do I have low blood sugar? Does my character need a pixie stick?

-The Russian Propaganda is a HUGE oof, but eh. If Wolfenstein had been released while Germany was trying to start WW3, it would have had the same effect, but I still would have loved the game. Also, wtf is with China? lol. I'm not a big politics guy, but you can feel a few agendas being pushed. I even got a large "Amazon is going to take over the world" vibe.

TLDR:
I love what the game could be, I'm just hardly immersed in the world, despite how beautifully creepy it is. The pacing for jumpscares and action is so off. FOV is atrocious and you'll need a 3rd party tool to fix it. The main character is a pathetic, cringe-y loser. Jumpscares are weak. Game just doesn't feel polished, but Gah damn I could stare at some of those textures for hours. Incels would enjoy this game, which is why I have to give it above a 5.

6/10 in it's current state, but still not recommended. Might as well get Xbox game pass to play the game for $10. F**k you, Andrew Tate's Babushka.

ver segsy gaem

6/10 This game is meh. Doesn't give you enough inventory space to start with. Combat is eh. Space fighting is pretty bad. Forces you to play against groups of players as a solo. The only reason I'm happy to play it is because it's a more casual Tarkov.

Insanely good. Keeps gameplay exciting in every chapter. Fun minigames. Fantastic art style. Childish story, but an important one at that. Only 1 friend has to buy the game as well? PFFFT! I'LL TAKE IT! Easily 99.5/10

The only time I have fun playing this game is when I'm playing rush, and even that is destroyed by characters OP abilities. This Battlefield has some of the most depressing level design I've ever seen in a game. I have a beast of a computer and I sit at a solid 60fps on low-medium settings with DLSS on. Season pass is absolute garbage, with maybe 8% of the cosmetics being worth it.

Top 3 best FPS single player games of all time. I hope to see a remaster one day.