Recent reviews by CUBEstar

A dead simple game with an easy premise. You're a ram and you gotta headbutt your way to freedom by way of sumo. If you knock yourself out or get hit, you lose. Each level gets progressively harder, but seemingly you get an achievement for each level you pass... even though they're less than a minute long in some cases.

I was on the verge of giving this a reccomend, but I nuked my save _way_ too easy and lost all my progress. Also, since they're selling this for 29.99(!) "ordinarily", I know what type of game they're playing: the grifty Steam key store game. The fact they gave this away at IGN Live some makes me think they indeed manipulated this guy to get the value pack-in. Or perhaps, the dev out-grifted the master grifters at IGN.

On a side note, and this isn't affecting my rating, the dev somehow thought it was necessary to make an AI-generated four-panel comic about rams and stuff and call it the first in a series. It's been over a year; he never made another.

In any case, the game has a cool concept that if it was released as an HTML5 or flash game. Nobody would have batted an eye. Yet sometimes, games like these work as shields that unscrupulous people manifest themselves behind as you activate the next 'premium Steam key package'. I hope this guy reforms his ways, or burns in hell. One of the two.

Funny concept, but not for me, and it just doesn't have enough going for it to recommend others purchase.

A very, very thoughtful upgrade of a game whose meme factor overshadowed its music and innovative "seizer beam" mechanic (which lets you grab enemies, use them as shields and hurl them forward). The rewind mechanic, seen in fellow remasters like Gimmick, has got me absolutely abusing it like Braid to progress forward in the game, but I appreciate the accessibility greatly. There was really a lot of heart put into this port and you can tell they felt the weight on their shoulders.

But it's not all sunshine, laser beams and rainbows - now that the CATS out of the bag we oughta be honest. The control scheme is absolutely horrific on a keyboard, and they don't really ease you in from the get go. But if you can put up with that, or pick up a controller, you'll have an decent time.

A positively beautiful game that I have no clue how to play, because I'm not a tabletop type of dude. Frustrating, because it is 7 degrees level of polished. Animations are cool, graphically looks cool (although I may not agree with how the characters are represented in this weird Minecraft/Roblox inconsistent fusion). The enemies, skills, and weapons are all fleshed out...

Funny enough, I couldn't even make it past the title screen the first time I launched the game. I went into the "create" menu and was confused when it didn't take me to gameplay. Then I learned "oh, gotta click the chest." Got into the game and played about 5 minutes. Has all the hallmarks of a good game except I couldn't exactly be sure what I ought to do. I moved, then attacked, then realized my "attack" was just selecting a spell and displaying its properties. And clicking on enemies sometimes shows _their_ properties... it was confusing.

Also, Moist Critikal is in this game as trollface. Of course, a guy with a schedule as BUSY as this... he recorded his lines at home. A lot of VAs on this project did. This isn't affecting my rating, just thought I'd mention that because I thought it was kinda funny.

2.5/5, don't let me discourage you from buying this game, but you gotta know what you're getting into. I think I got this from a Humble Bundle, because I'm not trying to be funny here, I seriously walked into this not knowing what kind of game I was gonna get. And what I got isn't for me, but it might be for you.

An asset flip made by a shovelware developer.

This game feels like working with a stock image. You don't know the person in the photo. You feel the impersonality radiating from the fact you know they had 300 other poses to do that day. You see a pose captured with stillness permeating for an eternity. And in this moment you realize even though the pose was made for you, a gamer, it's not an actual doctor performing a checkup, it's not a baker baking a cake, it's not a construction worker looking over the job site. It's a staged photo. And like that, the game feels almost fake.

Sector Zero's stages are varied, but for some of them there isn't even a fail condition, you can roam endlesssly into any direction you'd like and there's no penalty. The goal is to complete the stage and you are rewarded with more medals that'll let you progress into the next sector. Except there's one small problem... playing the game as you expect will make you fall well short into the required medals needed to progress into the next sector. Apparently they want you to roam like it's an RPG. There's only one problem: this game has no clue what it wants to be.

Ultra-mega-kill. The tutorial failed to explain you are racing against time also (and it's a simple concept, you die if you don't keep killing), but the game itself is pretty fun and the aesthetic is remarkably effective at selling a high octane experience. Later levels become progressively harder but you get to choose upgrades to power yourself up as well. A very memorable zoomer shooter, and I mean that in a good way

I hated the ♥♥♥♥ out of this game, but I realized I played a game just like this and gave it a thumbs up. So I'll let it be. The perfect version of this game is Out There Somewhere, but this ain't it.

Better than Celeste, and I disabled comments so I can say that in MY safe space.

If Soulja Boy and friends played this game instead of Braid, the whole thing would make a whole lot more sense, and Jonathan Blow wouldn't be in melancholy with the San Francisco skyline in the background.

But seriously, this game plays one of a kind. Sure, it's an open world souls-like with procgen enemies and weapons. But the hue rotations when you get hit, the music being a synth-wave trance to get lost to. You blaze through the skys and you can drop in and unlock new abilities, and your weapons can grow to comical sizes with the help of NPCs. You can easily sink several hours into this game, I did, and I was just cleaning out my Steam backlog. But I definitely am gonna come back to this, the juice beckons for more.