Recent reviews by Lt. Ladders

This game is like the early stages of a game with a high difficulty curve, but without the part of those games where you eventually summit the mountain. Instead, you get kicked back to the bottom, forced to use weapons that are almost completely ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ worthless, and even when you get good weapons, they are either guns that summon even more zombies, which makes the entire point of the weapon moot, or they take 10+ slow, plodding swings to kill a *single* zombie, of which there are usually a minimum of 6-7. There is absolutely no sort of rewards in place, it is just spawn->find useless loot->get instantly murdered because the game randomly generated that the zombie's attack is one that infects you->repeat. And that's not even getting into the terrible netcoding and unresponsive control scheme. There is absolutely nothing redeeming about this game, and I am completely baffled that anyone would *want* to play it.

The second ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ screen of the game to log in to the stupid ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ Microsoft account shoehorned into this ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ game can be exited out of, but doing this will lock you right out of the game, for good. If you *dare* to attempt to open this game and not log in to a completely unnecessary system, then you will be permanently locked out of the game. *You can't even reinstall it*. This game has been out for 2 ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ years, and the second screen of the game, if clicked in the wrong spot, will permanently lock you out of the Master Chief Collection. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥ disgraceful.

You'll play this game for a few hours, get sick of all the ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥♥, then, a couple of hours later, you'll start it up again.

The random invisible walls make this the best Mime Simulator I've ever played.

Shotgun man, take me by the hand, lead me to the land that you understand
Shotgun man, the voyage to the corner of the globe is a real trip
Shotgun man, the crust of a tan man imbibed by the sand
Soaking up the thirst of the land
Shotgun man, can you see through the wonder of amazement at the oberman
Shotgun man, the crust is elusive when it casts forth to the childlike man
Shotgun man, the sequence of a life form braised in the sand,
Soaking up the thirst of the land
Shotgun man, ocean man
Shotgun man
Shotgun man, take me by the hand, lead me to the land that you understand
Shotgun man, the voyage to the corner of the globe is a real trip
Shotgun man, the crust of a tan man imbibed by the sand
Soaking up the thirst of the land
Shotgun man, can you see through the wonder of amazement at the oberman
Shotgun man, the crust is elusive when it casts forth to the childlike man
Shotgun man, the sequence of a life form braised in the sand,
Soaking up the thirst of the land
Shotgun man

It's like No Man's Sky, but good.

I never asked for this, but when i saw it on Humble Bundle...

This game is pretty fun. Its got a lot of features, that ill try to go over, but itll be tough. This one's gonna be long, so you may wanna skip down to the tl;dr version. I will be dividing it up into categories of gameplay, story, visuals, and sound.

Gameplay

The gameplay is pretty solid. its got elements for everyone. There is an FPS style of shooting, if you so wish, or, if you prefer, there is a cover system. There is also stealth, but its nothing spectacular. The game is pretty fun, but can get stale. It often just divulges into either endless using the cover system, or sneaking past fairly stupid enemies. However there is one big thing that sets this game apart from other FPS or TPS type games. Lots and lots of moral choices.

Moral choices abound in this game. One big one is the lethal/non-lethal options. Choosing Lethal means you put your enemies down for good, and dont have to worry about them later, but it's not neccesarily the right thing to do. Non-lethal is the moral high ground, if you will, and gives you a (slight) experience boost, but enemies can help unconcious teamates up, meaning their only out of the fight for a while. Another good sort of moral choice is during the Missing Link chapter, where you have to decide whther you save 1 scientist, to bring down a corrupt orginization, or save a large number of prisoners, trapped at the facility or, the conversations held. It really feels like talking to these people changes how the game works.

The RPG element of this game, consists of augmentations, or augs for short. Augs help your one-man army (who is actually kinda soft for an FPS) become even more powerful. In the normal version of Human Revolution, you cant get all the augs without farming, but in director's cut, beating the game unlocks New Game +, which allows you to keep all your augmentations.

I've heard that this game is supposed to be buggy, but I only found 2 bugs. One was a constant speeding up of subtitles, but I have ears, so no big deal. The other one was during a conversation, where all my character did was stand there and look surly, but eventually that fixed itself.

Another thing I've heard is that the bosses are bad. I found the 1st and 2nd bosses superb, and the last 2 looked like they would have been, but i fought them in a way that ended the fights relatively quickly. The final boss really does feel like a final boss, huge, menacing, hard to kill, that feels satisfying on the event of their death.

Story

The only problem I had with the story was that it was too short. Not in the sense that it was a short story, but I really wanted to hear more. All the charachters felt fleshed- out, like actual people, and I was genuinelly pissed when Faridah got shot, since I didnt know I could save her. As i mentioned earlier, the choices you make feel like they affect the game as a whole, and there is a large prevailing moral choice in the fighting.

Visuals

While they did make my computer extremely slow, and even made my video drivers crash (my computer kinda sucks), even on the lowest difficulty, everything looked pretty good. The charachters looked real, the textures looked solid, and the animations (despite obviously being copied and pasted durig less important dialogues) were pretty smooth.

Sounds

See above about the visuals, apply words that would fit sounds, and keep in mind my bug with the conversation.

tl;dr

Pros:

• Fun, varied gameplay
  
• Good morality system
  
• Good augmentation system
  
• Fun bosses
  
• Great story
  
• Great visuals
  
• Great sound
  
• Almost no bugs
  
  Cons:
  
  
• Gameplay starts to feel repetetive
  
• Copy-pasting during minor conversations

Final score: 9/10

A very good zombie simulator (based on most works of fiction that is).

Very loud noises (louder than gunshots) will bring swarms of zombies right towards you. Firing a gun will draw zombies in the immediate area to you. There is unique zombies for each area with special abilities. Panic events (either a horde attacking you for no real reason, or a loud noise that must be generated to continue the level) occur at the end of each campaign, forcing you to fight tons of zombies, and usually more than one Tank. speaking of which, there are special infected, rare zombies that spawn randomly through out your fight. they have special abilites, such as spitting acid, riding your character, and pouncing on you, doing steady damage.

I only recommend this game if you dont plan on having a life in the near future. very addicting.

I dont know if its any good. it makes me make a second account for no reason. and that account wont work. *sigh*

Awesome idea. Take guns, tear em apart to see how they work, put em back together, and watch em go. Not only that, competitive game modes, and shooting arenas, where you can shoot targets. But these guys? these guys f**cked it up.
For 1 its got dlcs (15 bucks to take apart 4 cars? and i thought Payday 2 was bad.) which can burn in hell. then its got game. holy crap, game. No hints. at all(unless you wanna lessen your score), and the AK and colt (which is far as i cared to go, because it was too terrible to play.) have pieces inside them, with tiny parts exposed. the only way i could do it without hints was clicking on the parts and looking for non-highlited parts.
Plus, the shooting range dengenrates into challenges. f**cking challenges. not fun, do whatever you want, shooting ranges, but f**cking challenges. and you know, it wants to be a facebook game.

I have only one problem. i find it addicting, yet horrible. i expected a sandox, game where you didnt need real money or playtime and shoot gatling guns.


run for your life guys.