Freak level? Infinite. Gooning hours? 3 AM. Kink shaming? Yeah.. when I’m dead. Rizz? Off the charts. ♥♥♥♥ size? Off the charts. ♥♥♥♥♥♥♥? Plenty. Femboys? Plenty. Love? For ♥♥♥♥. Drip? Oily and fresh. Freak Off’s attended? One, they couldn’t handle me. Asses ate? None that’s gay. Mental health? In the toilet. ♥♥♥♥? In the toilet. Farts? Cummy. Gun? Loaded. Brains? On the wall. Wife? Screaming.

I was hanging out with a female friend and a couple of her friends after going out for some drinks and grabbing some food. We all drank a decent amount and had greasy fast food after the club, my female friend drank a couple of beers with me which was a first and she also had a milkshake after the club which I thought was not appealing at all after a night of drinking but didn’t think anything of it at the time. Some time goes by as we are all hanging out she announces that she’s sorry but shes super gassy and has to fart and proceeds to rip the loudest unladylike farts I’ve ever heard a woman rip and this was non stop for the entire night.

She claimed she couldn’t help it and I honestly was in shock and at first it was funny but eventually it started to turn me on. I’m not sure why but something about her being so attractive with a nice ass coupled with her ripping farts with no regard for anyone just made my mind melt. I always knew she was attractive but I’ve always thought of her as a friend yet her uncontrollable gas did something to me

Even the smell didn’t stop me from being aroused. Something about her being so hot while doing something so “nasty” while still being so attractive. Once our friends left she spent the night continuously farting and it was to the point I had to excuse myself to the restroom during the night and masturbate. I was really ashamed that I could be so aroused from my friends farts and still can’t believe it. I’m not sure how to feel about it all and since then I’ve searched and found out I may have a fart fetish which I’m not so proud of. I’m still processing it all since it was just a couple days ago not sure what to do about it. Since then I can’t stop thinking about her farts. I got uncontrollably hard when she was farting and I’m just praying no one noticed or she didn’t, I tried my best not to get hard but couldn’t help it.

Gender: Male
Born: Apr. 15, 2038 (4/15/38)
Age (in human years): 19
Race: Unicorn
Sexuality: Bisexual
Coat: Clinical white
Mane: Phosphor monochrome green
Eyes: Green
Cutie mark:
Image: >_, green
Meaning: Exceptional technological skill
Accessories: N/A
Suffers: N/A
Location: Manehattan
Occupation: College student at CE University
Grade level: Sophmore (Bumped up a year in school)
Personality: Kind, calm, honest, and caring. Knows when to talk with sense, and can take control in extreme situations.
Family: Unknown
Relationship status: Single

"All you ever do is copy, all you ever do is mock
Why you talkin’ about me?
If you really got a problem, we can handle that problem, yeah, body to body

Y'all n*ggas don't know how to grow up, I been a OG since I was younger
All of my friends are dead, leave 'em in the cold, put 'em in the tundra

I go Ray Charles, I cannot see her, I make her fumble
I was just in Texas with Aliyah, her p*ssy a jungle

They wanted this album to be offset, but I told them, "I'm comin' normal"
When you play this sh*t wear a white tux', young n*gga, like you in a formal"

-Playboi Carti

Go, go, go, go
Head so good, she a honor roll
She'll ride the ♥♥♥♥ like carnival (Schyeah)
I done did the impossible (Schyeah)

She ride the ♥♥♥♥ like a carnival
Bend her over, havin' flashbacks, she gon' eat me up like a carnivore
It's the way I pop my ♥♥♥♥, the hoes not ready, I'm goin' barnacles
Movin', I feel like I'm Jason, can't get arrested, I make 'em stumble

She want a private section, roll off them X's when I'm on Melrose
She tatted my name on her titties, yeah, you can bust it, but it's a borrow
Hol' up, sittin' back, countin' up dubs, I was raised in the borough
She wanna taste it, checkin' the swag today, ho, come back tomorrow

If you know what I know, hide your ho
Just off the facts that we havin' them hunchos
Runnin' around in the lobby, I know that they tired of me havin' like ten hoes

She need some cresidentials just to be presidential, hol' up, hol' up
I'm 'bout to buy her some dentures, make that ho eat me for dinner, woah, woah

Pain all in my eyes, I can't see, uh
I'm 'bout to jump out my body, I'm ready to leap, uh

I'm 'bout to nut on her body and tell the ho leave, 'kay
Fifty mil' stuffed in the bag, tell the whole gang eat, uh

It's Ye and Barti, tell me who ♥♥♥♥♥♥' with we?
I'm hot like Tha Carter, I'm feelin' that ho in my sleep

Dollar signs all in my dreams, I don't never see Z's, woah (Woah-woah)
The swag cover my body like it's a disease, woah (Woah-woah)

Please respond, I am the mother of a 9 year old that you played Minesweeper with. After your [One "vs" One] match with him he came home with a sore back, not too long after that he got diagnosed with autism out of the sudden, my child has always been very loquacious and talktive, it all started changing after your match please tell me what happened in your private lobby, i tried joining the lobby but it asked for my credit card information for some reason so i didn't trust that, Please don't take offense in this but the internet is a wild place nowadays you can't trust anything anymore. more importantly tho, i await your reply, please contact me at "My_Kid_Has_Autisim@Hotmail.com" if you happen to read this.

6:30 is the best time on a clock, hands down.

i. am. the original fulcrum. COME IN... yuuuuuUUUUUUHHH yodie gang! you feel me?

Not funny I didn't laugh. Your joke is so bad I would have preferred the joke went over my head and you gave up re-telling me the joke. To be honest this is a horrid attempt at trying to get a laugh out of me. Not a chuckle, not a hehe, not even a subtle burst of air out of my esophagus. Science says before you laugh your brain preps your face muscles but I didn't even feel the slightest twitch. 0/10 this joke is so bad I cannot believe anyone legally allowed you to be creative at all. The amount of brain power you must have put into that joke has the potential to power every house on Earth. Get a personality and learn how to make jokes, read a book. I'm not saying this to be funny I genuinely mean it on how this is just bottom barrel embarrassment at comedy. You've single handedly killed humor and every comedic act on the planet. I'm so disappointed that society has failed as a whole in being able to teach you how to be funny.

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It's COOL to be gay!
Post this on the wall of a homosexual friend and tell them how COOL they are

Mmmmmmmm